353: Achieve Your Annual Goals with 10 Monthly Reflection Questions (Replay)

353: Achieve Your Annual Goals with 10 Monthly Reflection Questions (Replay)

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[00:00:00] Hi femtees, Doctora Yvette here. I'm still on a short break as I ease into the new year. So today's episode is another replay. I'll be back next week with brand new episodes, but for today, I'm resharing a very popular episode on how to achieve your annual goals using 10 monthly reflective questions. Instead of rushing into setting big goals, this episode focuses on using a monthly reflection practice as a more intentional way to track progress, notice your growth, and stay grounded in your values and wellbeing throughout the year. I walk you through the exact questions that I personally use to reflect on my accomplishments, challenges, energy, relationships, and long-term goals. You can use it too to build your own consistency at your pace without having to have everything figured out in January. Enjoy the show. Let's get into the [00:01:00] episode.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Do you ever find yourself making these really big new year intentions or annual goals and then a month or two in you have forgotten about them or it feels like it's such a long shot it's never going to happen so you don't even try. I know I've been there. This has happened to me more times than I'd like to admit.

And so this year I decided to test out something different. I came up with a new system that's a monthly reflection system to help me to better keep track of my goals and my progress. And I'm excited to share that it's been working. So for today, I thought that I would share with you. The exact questions that I ask myself every month to help me make progress on my short and long term goals like a pro.

So don't miss out and tune in.

Welcome[00:02:00]

to the award winning Grad School Femtoring Podcast, the place for first gen BIPOCs to listen in on inclusive grad school stories and learn about personal development and productivity tips. This is Dr. Yvette Martinez-Vu, a certified coach, consultant, and author, and I will be serving as your femtor, providing you with insider knowledge to help you reach your personal and professional goals.

Welcome back everyone to another episode of the Grad School Femtoring Podcast. This is your host, Dr. Yvette. Today we are talking about my monthly reflection exercise and how to track your annual progress like a pro. I decided to address this because I recently was [00:03:00] going back to do my monthly reflection and I thought to myself, wow, this resource is actually quite helpful and could be helpful for my listeners. I also recently shared it with a client because we were checking in at the beginning, usually at the beginning, the first five minutes, when we ask each other how we're doing, I'll share a little bit about what I have going on.

I mentioned it. And she was really excited about it. Okay. And so I shared these questions with her. And so that's why I thought, well, you know what? Let me share the wealth and share it with everybody else who listens to my podcast. So in terms of why this even matters, I want to make sure that you know that there is a purpose in reflecting.

There is a purpose in tracking. And that all of this is going to help you not just with reaching your goals, but actually help you with strengthening the learning process. One thing I wanted to mention is a paper. There's a [00:04:00] paper titled learning by thinking, how reflection can spur progress along the learning curve.

And in this paper, the Folks who worked on this research identified ways that reflection can impact your learning and your performance, and they found that through articulation, or thinking, and through codification, or writing, reflecting can boost your performance. Of course, it depends on the type of tasks that you work on, and it also depends on the complexity of the tasks and how much you do that task.

But in any case, reflection can be a powerful tool to enhance your learning and your performance. So that is the point here, that we're not just doing this to add another thing on your calendar when you already have a million things to do. We're doing this because there is data to [00:05:00] prove that it's going to improve your performance and your learning.

So if you care about your efficacy, and if you care about your growth, then it might be worth giving this a shot, or at the very least identifying your own. own reflective exercises that you can continuously work on. For some folks, maybe you want to do this every day. Other folks, you might want to do it every week.

Or if you're like me, I don't love having to do something every single day. But what I can commit to is for some things, I can do them every week. And for other things, I can do them every month. And so for my annual progress, reflecting on my annual goals, it does help me to do this at least once a month. Now, If that wasn't enough to convince you, another thing I want to mention is that having a consistent reflective [00:06:00] practice of identifying the goals that you're achieving and also the things that you're still working toward, that can also help you to combat the imposter phenomenon because you are reminding yourself and documenting your growth, documenting your achievements, And so next time you start to feel bad about yourself, you can go back to the data that you have on what you've been working on this year and pat yourself on the back to remind yourself, you know what?

I'm not doing as bad as I think. So let's get straight into it. What are these questions? For me, I've chosen to identify 10 questions. Of course, you can always tailor this for yourself and add a few more questions or take away some questions, whatever works for you. These are the ones that I like to ask myself each month.

First, I ask myself, what were your top three accomplishments this month? This forces me to think [00:07:00] about things that I did well. Even if it's not big, lofty accomplishments, even something like This month I went out to the park and walked consistently. That's great. Or maybe it's, what's another accomplishment, like a personal accomplishment of mine this year, which most people will not care about, but it means so much to me and it helps me remain so grateful.

is the fact that I've expanded my energy envelope. What that means is that I have been gently pushing myself to do a little bit more and a little bit more in terms of my movement so that way I am can do more without flaring up and I know it's different for every single person who has chronic illnesses or disabilities.

This may or may not be possible, but knowing and tuning into my body, I've been trying to find ways to. [00:08:00] Expand what I can do so that way now I can stand for longer periods of time without feeling like I have to faint. That's a big deal to me. Another personal accomplishment or win for me is that I have also expanded the range of foods that I can eat.

For many years, I've struggled with several food intolerances, food items that have literally sent me to the ER. And this year I've been micro dosing, or that's the word I choose to, to use to refer to me eating small amounts of things that formerly would make me very, very sick. And that has helped me to expand my diet.

And so now. Even though I still follow a mostly plant based vegan diet, I'm able to eat certain non vegan items that before would make me really, really sick. So I'm really, really happy about that. It excites me because it means [00:09:00] that it has expanded the world of possibilities in terms of what I can eat and the type of pleasure and nourishment I get from foods.

That is an accomplishment. Again, you get to decide what counts as an accomplishment. Now, the second question I ask myself is, what challenges did you overcome? And this reminds me that no matter what, there's always going to be a challenge that comes your way. And no matter what, there are ways that you can deal with them, manage them, and even overcome them.

And so you get to decide what those challenges are. And you get to remind yourself that you got through it. So that next time you deal with a similar challenge, you can go back and remind yourself, I've been here before and I can get through it again. The third question I asked myself is how did you take care of your physical, mental and [00:10:00] spiritual wellbeing?

This one's really, really important to me because I have historically not tended to my physical, mental and spiritual wellbeing. That's what landed me to getting really, really sick. And so now I'm Very intentional about no matter how busy I get, no matter how much work I have, no matter how much I have going on in my life, I need to prioritize my survival.

And to do that, I need to carve out time for my physical health. That means for me more movement, more walks, more More stretching, more dancing. That also means mentally doing the things that I know that help me to manage my mental health. What are the daily habits that help me to decrease the chances that I will fall into a depression or feel very, very anxious.

So my mental wellbeing is really important. Grounding exercises are really [00:11:00] important. And then of course my spiritual wellbeing. And this one's the one that tends to be put to the side the most, and I have to remind myself to make time for it. And so that might mean, you know, for instance, we recently had the Dia de Muertos, and so creating a small little altar, even if it's not this big lofty one, like we've made in the past, but even something small that includes a little offering.

A little veladora, a couple of images of my loved ones who have passed. I remind myself that it's, that I can make time for this, that I can pray, that I can reflect and do the things that help me tune into my spirituality more. So that's my fourth question. Question number five is what relationships did you build or nurture and how?

Relationship building is really important to me. It's something that I've learned that I have to make [00:12:00] time for , no matter what happens in my life, because we cannot do things alone. I've talked about this in the last episode about the importance of community. And therefore I make time in my calendar to form new connections and also to nurture old connections.

And I will write down about that, about what came up for me. Who did I reconnect who I hadn't talked to in many years? Who did I meet that I had never met before, who I really enjoyed talking to and want to talk to again? Who do I want to check in with to let them know that I'm thinking of them? That's what I mean with this question.

Question six is what's one habit you'd like to improve next month? When I think of habits, I think of day to day things that you do without even thinking twice. And I know that it can be especially challenging for me to do something consistently enough for it to become a habit. There's still many, many [00:13:00] things that I wish I could do.

I could improve and set up a system to make it into a habit, and I haven't gotten there. But this allows me to think about that and be more intentional about, well, how can I turn this into a system so that I can turn it into a habit? And that's why I ask myself that, because habits are important. in terms of maintaining consistency for the things that are important to you.

Question seven is what are you most grateful for from the past month? And by what are you most grateful for, sometimes it also means who are you most grateful for. So I include that within that question. And it just reminds me to remain grateful no matter what happens, no matter what challenges come up, there's always something to be grateful for.

Even if it means having a roof over your head, having food. To eat, having, just whatever you need to ensure your survival, having those things, being alive. I'm grateful for [00:14:00] that. So what are you most grateful for? Question eight. How did you progress towards your long term goals? This is a question that helps me go back to the things that I said that I was going to get done at the beginning of the year.

Sometimes it does mean having to modify my yearly goals, but it reminds me to go back and refer back to it so that I don't forget what are my long term goals. What are my annual goals? Even if I'm thinking about three to five years, what are those goals too? Question nine is what was an unexpected joy?

Or surprise. And I love this one because this helps me to go back and remind myself of the things that were fun or that brought a smile to my face. Some months that might be receiving a really kind message in my email or in my DMs. Other months it might be getting to surprise my kids with something that they love.

[00:15:00] Other months it might be receiving Or checking in with an old friend who I hadn't talked to in a while, or getting to try out a new restaurant that was more delicious than I thought. Oh, actually that was, that just came up for us. We just tried a local Vietnamese restaurant. And if you don't know this, my partner's Vietnamese American, and we both loved Vietnamese food.

And we're always kind of hesitant, just like we're hesitant to try Mexican places, cause I have a very high bar for what is good Mexican food. We're very hesitant about Vietnamese places. And we tried it out and the food was surprisingly really good. So I'm like, yay, we have a spot, we have a local spot that we can go and get our favorite Vietnamese dishes.

So. An unexpected joy or surprise went there, didn't expect much. Weren't sure if we were going to like it. And then next thing you know, it was a lot better than we thought. All right. So now let's get to the last question. The last question I ask [00:16:00] myself every month is, if you could change one thing about this month, what would it be?

This one is usually my hardest one to answer. And it's not just because it's the last one, but it's because. I tend to make decisions now based on a combination of data and intuition, and in some ways my intuition is coming from internal data as well. And so I don't usually regret what I do. And when I think about if you could change one thing, sometimes I go straight to that.

Like, well, what do I regret? What I wish I could take back, but it doesn't necessarily have to be that. It could just mean like, if something happened that you wish didn't happen, what would that be? So one example that comes to mind that got me really emotional was recently writing, if I could have my therapist [00:17:00] not pass away, I would, of course, definitely change that, or even some things about my own family dynamics and challenges that some of my family members are dealing with.

If there was something that I could do that. I had the power within me to change in their circumstances. I would change that. So it just reminds me of my core values and the things that are most important to me when I think about the things that I wish that I could change. Even sometimes it's like, it's systemic issues.

Like I'll just be, be very, very angry about certain messed up systemic issues. And I will write about that. So you get to decide what you write about here. And for me, I use this as again, a reflection on like, what are the things that really matter to me? Now, those are my 10 questions.

There are a couple of questions I want to mention that you might want to include in yours too. Again, [00:18:00] you want to make this your own if you want to include this as your own monthly reflection exercise. You might want to ask yourself, what am I most proud of for this month? You might also want to ask yourself, what mistakes or failures did I face and what did they teach me?

You could ask yourself, what resources or systems helped me? You can also ask yourself, what cultural strengths or lineages did I draw on this month? And you can ask yourself, what support did I receive from others? Again, I've selected these questions with the purpose of helping me and helping you too now to identify the things that you're doing, that you're doing well, to identify the things that you can do to keep taking care of yourself.

To [00:19:00] identify the things that you can keep working on to help you improve your personal growth and also to help you improve the likelihood of you reaching your goals and really to embrace like an asset and strength based approach to you, which can include Your cultural background, which can include your lineages and ancestry, which can include the resources and systems and the people that you rely on who are helping you.

The last thing I want to leave you with is a reminder for how to implement this to make sure that you can do this regularly. Because I know that not everybody can just quickly, implement something and make it a habit without any issues. Some of us need to be more intentional to be able to develop this into a consistent habit.

And so if you're someone who's worried, Oh, I might not be able to keep up with this, [00:20:00] or I might forget about it. Listen up. One thing I recommend, and this is the obvious, of course everybody probably already thinks about doing this. when you think about making it consistent is setting aside a specific day and or time, ideally both, each month for you to do it.

So maybe it's the second day of each month or the second first Tuesday of each month you make time for this. So setting aside some time to do it. When you're doing it, you want to make sure that you do it in a comfortable environment. And that might mean setting up certain rituals that work for you.

That might mean being in a space where you can have fewer distractions or wear your noise canceling headphones. Or maybe every time you do it, you have the same little mug with tea, whatever helps you to [00:21:00] get in the zone. Do that. You also want to have this in a format that works for you because there's no point in you getting a paper planner if you're never going to use the paper planner or you're going to forget about it.

There's no point in you trying to put this on a Google doc if you're always going to lose the Google doc. There's no point in you having it set up in a way that you won't be able to easily access and easily use it. In my case, this has been a game changer for me. I used to do this monthly reflecting.

I've done it on like notebooks and handwritten things. And then my hands hurt. I have also done this on Google docs. And then again, I, I find it, whether it's one doc or multiple docs, I find that it. It gets really [00:22:00] long and then it's hard to get an aerial big picture view of the data or the information, the reflecting.

And so this time around, I decided to add these questions to a Google form. This is the game changer. You know why? Because I fill out this form with 10 questions the way I would fill out any other survey. Doesn't have to be long. And then once I'm done, Every month I have this spreadsheet of information and I can easily compare and contrast what is coming up for me and how my achievements or my challenges or the things I'm grateful for, how they change each month.

So if you want to try that out, I'm giving you this idea. It's been a lot of fun and it's been relatively easy to use and easy to keep up with it. The other thing I want to mention is to maybe encourage yourself to reach out and do [00:23:00] this with a friend. I am a big fan of co working with others. I'm a big fan of body doubling.

And so if you know, you're never going to keep up with it unless you do it with someone else. Then I encourage you to mention this idea, send this episode to a friend and have you all meet every month to work on this. And then lastly, I hope that you can pair this with every time you fill out these reflective questions, you then pair it, or if you want to call it habit stacking, you would like match it with celebrating yourself.

So fill it out. And then after that, do something to celebrate yourself. Why? Because rewards work. This is how you maintain habits is by making sure you're consistently rewarding yourself. It doesn't have to be a big thing either. But make sure you celebrate yourself. I know I have been, I mean, I still, I still, to this day, struggle to celebrate [00:24:00] myself, but I sometimes I force myself to, and celebrating myself might mean sharing an achievement publicly, or it might mean giving myself the coolest new sticker sheet, or it might mean treating myself to my favorite beverage.

There's just so many different ways that you can celebrate yourself. One of my favorite ways, which does involve spending money, so I don't do it all the time, is getting myself a new pair of beaded earrings because I absolutely adore beaded earrings. If I could afford it, I would just do that all the time and celebrate and like support amazing women of color businesses and women of color artists.

But right now I have to be more selective because I don't have all the money in the world, but in any case figure out that thing, the thing that is for you, the way that you love to celebrate yourself. So those are my quick implementation tips. Schedule time out in your month, once a month to do it.

Make sure you have a comfortable [00:25:00] environment. Make sure you have these questions in a format that works for you. Make sure you have your friend or colleagues or whoever it is that are going to join you along to hold you accountable to doing this regularly. And then of course, celebrate yourself. So pair this with celebrating yourself so that you can incentivize it.

That's it. Just one last thing. Again, if I didn't convince you just quite yet, Remember, this is all data. And a lot of y'all that listen to this podcast, I know you're researchers, not everybody's a researcher, but a good number of y'all are. So if you know, if you are into research, you know, that data is really important.

And so you can access this internal data for yourself to give you data points about the things that make you, you the things that are your strengths, the things that you can share or maybe even brag about during your [00:26:00] job interviews or in your grad school application essays or in a performance review or even in any document where you're writing about your short and long term goals, you can refer back to this and this can help you.

So that's it. I hope you got something useful out of this episode. And as always, I will talk to you all next time. Bye.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Thanks so much for listening. If you liked what you heard, here are three ways you can support the show. The first is to make sure you're subscribed and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. The second way is to get your copy of my free resource kit linked in my show notes. This kit includes tools, worksheets, and podcast playlists on all things grad school, productivity, and personal development.

The third way to support my show is to follow me on social media. [00:27:00] You can find me on Instagram with the handle at gradschoolfemtoring and on LinkedIn by searching my name. Thanks again for listening. And until next time.