285: Intentional Rituals to Boost Your Focus

285: Intentional Rituals to Boost Your Focus

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Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: [00:00:00] This episode is brought to you by my Grad School Femtoring Collaborative Workshops. If you're a first gen scholar looking to transition from academia to industry, I've got just the thing for you. On October 2nd at 4 p. m. Pacific time, I'll be moderating a virtual workshop called From PhD to Paycheck, Tactical Approaches to Transition into Industry Careers for First Gen Scholars.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: I'm teaming up with my dear friend, Doctora Esther Trujillo, a research professional and recovering academic who made the leap from being a professor to a corporate research leader at JPMorgan Chase. She's sharing all the goods from networking techniques that actually work and are introvert friendly, to writing a winning resume, and even creating multiple backup plans while you're still in higher ed.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Have you ever dreaded doing something so badly that you waited until the last minute to do [00:01:00] it, or you didn't do it at all? Have you ever found yourself dreading something to the point where you sit down, you've carved out time, and no matter what, you're still struggling to focus? I know that feeling because that's the feeling that I get when I think about the process of writing.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Yes, even though I am a published author, even though I've written a 250 plus page dissertation, I still, to this day, dread writing. But one of the things that I've learned to do over time is to try out and implement some intentional rituals to help me with focusing, especially on the things that I dread.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So for today's episode, that's the topic that I'm covering. I hope you find it helpful.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Welcome to the top global [00:02:00] ranked and award nominated grad school femtoring podcast. The place for first gen BIPOCs to listen in on conversations about grad school, And growth. In this podcast, you'll learn about all things higher education, personal development, and sustainable productivity. This is Dr.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Yvette Martinez Vu, and I will be serving as your femtor, providing you with tips and tricks and everything else you need to know to successfully navigate grad school and beyond. For over 14 years, I've been empowering first gen students of color along their personal and professional journeys. And I'm really excited to support you too.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Welcome back everyone to another episode of the Grad School Femtoring Podcast. This is your host, Dr. Yvette. Yes, today we're covering intentional rituals to boost your focus. It's a topic that was brought up by one of my recent clients.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: [00:03:00] She reached out When we were having a session, she actually asked me if I had any resources on what to do when you've done all the planning, you've done all the organizing, you have your time blocking, you know exactly what you're supposed to do when, and you sit your butt down and you still can't do the work.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: What then? What do you do when you're really struggling to focus, especially when you're working on something that's hard, that's scary, that's dreadful? So this episode is thanks to her, uh, dedicated to her. She knows who she is. And also it's to everybody here who has ever had that feeling. And I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Um, and it's especially helpful for grad students who are working on qualifying exams and dissertations that can feel like a big monster sometimes. So let's get into the topic for today. Now, Why did I, um, why did I decide [00:04:00] to use the word rituals as opposed to habits? So I'm calling rituals the things that you do at any time, but for the purpose of this episode, I'm going to be focusing on pre work rituals.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So the things that you do before you start your work that you're intentionally doing to help you with getting in the zone of getting work started. So the things that you can do, they're intentional practices to help you with diving into your tasks, help you with getting started on your tasks. What makes this different from habits is that rituals aren't habits yet.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So habits are subconscious things that you do that you don't even think twice about. They are so subconscious that they're relatively easy for you to do. Rituals Aren't necessarily subconscious, and they're not necessarily easy to do, [00:05:00] but because they're intentional, they hold meaning to you. So you can have rituals that are meaningful because of emotionally what they mean to you, spiritually what they mean to you.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: There's all kinds of ways to set up rituals. I know folks who have pre work rituals that involve listening to certain music, Lighting a candle, doing something that for them is meaningful and thoughtful, and again, helps them get in the zone of working. So, why would you even want to do this? Because I'm already thinking about someone who's saying, Wait, hold up, if I'm already getting distracted, if I'm already struggling to focus, why are you giving me another thing to do?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: That's getting in the way of me getting started and hear me out here. So the benefits of Trying out some pre work rituals until you figure out the thing that helps the thing that works that thing that helps you to get Into that focus that you are desiring and into doing the [00:06:00] work that you're dreading is that it Eventually if you find the thing that works it can either depending on what you do make you feel more grounded You reduce your feelings of tension, give you a greater sense of clarity, and even enhance your focus, enhance your flow, make it easier for you to get into doing that work that historically perhaps because you're dreading it, you either are waiting till the last minute to do it or not doing it at all.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So that's why you might want to try this out. So how do you know what kind of rituals to test out? The first thing you have to do is identify what your triggers are. And by triggers, for lack of a better word, I mean the, the thoughts and feelings that are getting in the way of you getting started on your work.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So what are the thoughts and feelings that you're having? Are you feeling restless? Are you feeling overwhelmed? Are [00:07:00] you feeling highly distracted? Are you feeling uncertain? Are you feeling anxious? Are you feeling like you have no motivation? Again, identify what is the main thing that's coming up for you right now.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: And I'll give two examples. I'll start off with an example for me. A common trigger for me that causes me to lose focus is feeling overwhelmed. Now, the secondary common trigger for me is having lots of distractions. So, Feeling easily distracted and also feeling easily overwhelmed. For the feelings of overwhelm, there's a couple of things that I have done and continue to do.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: When it comes to writing, in particular, one thing I started to do when I was in grad school was I started this journaling practice. I would call it my pre writing time. So before I started my dissertation work for the day, I would give myself Up to 10 minutes [00:08:00] to write out all my thoughts and feelings about how I was dreading doing the work.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: It was stream of consciousness, literally everything I thought I would type. And eventually, after 5 to 10 minutes, I would get tired of typing out my thoughts and that would, that feeling of release and also that feeling of practicing typing got me in the zone of getting ready to write and getting ready to work on my dissertation.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Sometimes, I would vent enough or just say, Word vomit enough what was going on and what I was feeling what I was thinking that I would reach an aha moment I would sometimes reach breakthroughs and realize oh, this is why I've been struggling so much because I gave myself time to process It didn't always happen Even when it didn't happen again the act of releasing it the act of letting it go the act of then I was done Sometimes I saved [00:09:00] my journal, sometimes I didn't, but either way I let it out.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: That still helped me. Now, for feeling easily distracted, that's a whole other thing because that is still something that I struggle with to this day. Um, you know, One of the things that I do, uh, when it comes to distractions is I have to figure out what are the things that are distracting me the most.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Sometimes it's environmental distractions. So sometimes it's like noises. It could be my kids. Sometimes it's seeing a mess or seeing something that's prompting me to want to do something else. Sometimes it's notifications. Email notifications, social media notifications. And so I have to figure out what is the thing that's distracting me and then I try to target the thing.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So sometimes it means putting my phone on do not disturb. Sometimes it means hiding or closing out my tab that has my email so I'm not distracted by my emails. Sometimes it means [00:10:00] hiding things within my line of sight that I know that could potentially distract me. So that's. Something that I do again at the start of doing the things that I dread and it's only the things that I dread here because I personally have no problem with going straight into doing work that I enjoy.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: That I can hyper focus and if anything the problem is the opposite. The problem is stopping myself from doing it because I could go on and on and on and then Lose track of time or not eat, not drink, etc. So for that, I need to set reminders to force me to take breaks so that way I don't overdo it. So you have to figure out what is coming up for you because you are not me.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: And so what works for me, the stuff that are related to distractions, the stuff that are related to overwhelm, might have nothing to do with you. Maybe for you, you just are feeling really restless. What can you do if you're feeling [00:11:00] restless? Maybe you set up some sort of movement practice, five minutes of stretching before you get started, or ten minutes of meditation or grounding exercise to get you started.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Something that gets you out of that feeling restless, physically or emotionally restless. Maybe you are someone who is feeling really uncertain. Maybe you're sitting down to do the work, but you're like, I don't know if I should start with this. I don't know if I should work on that. I don't know. This is so big.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: I don't, I'm not sure how to even get started. Maybe if you're dealing with that, it could help to give yourself permission to have 15 minutes, half an hour, no more than an hour. It's a delimited period of time so that you don't take up all of your work time doing this. Make a plan. What is your weekly plan?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: What is your, um, daily plan? Even having an extended [00:12:00] timeline, I do this a lot with my clients, my longtime listeners, you've heard me say this before. In fact, I dedicated an entire episode on how to do this on creating dissertation timelines. So for anyone who has a big project, including folks who I've worked with who have had fellowships who are working professionals, but they happen to be on a fellowship or who are working professionals, but they've got big projects to do.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: It's, Laying out a monthly timeline up to the date of when they're supposed to complete the thing the project and then Breaking that up into okay. Now that you know what your monthly goals are. What do you need to do each week to reach that? I mean, okay So if that's your weekly goal then turn that into your weekly plan and figure out what days are you gonna do?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: What so that way you can increase the chances of you reaching your weekly goals based on? Your weekly plan. So, you know, that's one of the things I was actually talking to a client about recently [00:13:00] too, is that there's a difference between. Knowing how to manage your tasks and coming up with a weekly plan.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So we all have tasks, we all have a million and one things to do. We have so many different facets of our lives and it's good to have some sort of system for keeping track of tasks, for getting them out of your head into something else. That could be a paper planner, it could be a digital task management system, but just getting it out of your head can be helpful.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: But that's not the same as having a plan to help you increase your chances of reaching your goal, whatever that big main goal is that you're working on. And sometimes we have multiple goals, but you know, for the purpose of this episode, I'm assuming that you're working on one main thing. That main thing could be your dissertation, your qualifying exam.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So it's constantly reminding yourself, do I have a plan for the week of what I need to do this week to reach that main goal? If not, then give yourself a break. Like I said, a [00:14:00] delimited period of time to do that planning and then stop there. Once you have the plan, cut yourself off because that's the other thing that can happen.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: I've got folks on all the ends of the spectrum. I've got folks who don't plan at all, keep it all in their head. But, you know, they can get work done. The problem is figuring out what they're going to do when, because they can execute. And then I've got folks on the other end of the spectrum where they spend too much time planning and organizing.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: And if anything, that's preventing them from actually executing. So you don't want to be Only planning and only executing with no direction. You want to be somewhere in the middle where you feel like you have a sense of direction and a plan, but you're also able to get work done and even do the work that is hard and that you might be avoiding.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So, um, another thing I wanted to say is just I wanted to bring up the example of low motivation. [00:15:00] And I wanted to bring this one up in particular for folks who are struggling with their mental health because It's one thing for me to say, yes, develop a ritual, it can help you. And it's another thing to be substantially struggling with your mental health the way that I was when I was in grad school.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: The first thing I want to say is one, if you're struggling with your mental health a lot, actually not even a lot, just In general, if you're struggling at all, please, please, please reach out, get professional support in the form of working with a therapist. As a graduate student, you probably, and if you're an undergrad listening, you too, you probably have access to mental health support services through your university.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: If you are a working professional, you might have access to those services to through your employer benefits. And if you're someone that's self employed like I am, I hope that you can find a way to prioritize that in your budget or to find [00:16:00] low cost, um, therapy services. Uh, there are websites for, um, Yeah, low or affordable therapy services out there.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So I just want to mention that because I am not a therapist and I 100 percent believe in therapy. It's helped me out a lot. So there's that. Now, if you feel like you're getting the support you need, but you're also Also needing to find ways to get the work done. And the big thing that's coming up for you is a low motivation.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So if, if you're feeling like no matter what, you just, you're not in the mood, you don't feel like getting started. What can you do? Sometimes it might mean leaning into community, leaning into your peers, leaning into your loved ones. Do you have someone that you can check in with or who can check in with you regularly, whether that's a best friend, whether that's a Someone in your [00:17:00] cohort.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: It could be a partner. It could be anyone who you trust that you can say, Hey, I'm kind of struggling right now, but I have this deadline and I have this goal that I want to reach. And Would it be okay for me to check in with you every day just to let you know what I'm doing? Or, you know, would you be okay if I checked in with you a couple times a week?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Or are you open to checking in on me once a week just to make sure that I'm making progress and that I'm okay? So making sure, I know it's hard when you're really struggling with low motivation and struggling with your mental health. It's so hard to reach out and get help. But um,

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Just remind yourself that there are people out there that care about you and there are people out there that want to see you thrive and that you deserve to ask for help. You deserve to get support. And I say that as [00:18:00] someone who historically I have, I have struggled to ask for help. So lean in on your community, figure out ways to check in with others or have others check in on you.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: In fact, that is a pre work ritual in that you can make it so that every time before you get started on your work, you check in with a friend. Hey, just checking in really briefly. I'm about to work on X, Y, and Z. Hope you're having a good day. And that's it. Now, another thing you can do maybe if you're You are struggling with low motivation, but you're still been able to do some work on your own.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Maybe you don't need the check ins as much as just listening to something that gets you in the mood. Maybe it's soothing music. Maybe it's energizing music. Maybe it's certain sounds or noises. Maybe it's background noises. Maybe it's, you know, What are they called? Um, ambience or ambient [00:19:00] noises, binaural beats, brown noise, pink noise, just figuring out what can help you to get in the zone consistently, especially when You can't just go straight into the work.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: There are, there are days, there are moments and there are tasks that I don't need all the things that I can just open up my computer and do the thing, open up my computer and answer an email. And then there are times and there are tasks that I dread and that I avoid. And then I'm like, okay, I need my extra supports.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: I need my music. I need my headphones. I need my timer. And I'm just going to get this done. I'm going to break it up into the tiniest baby step and I'm going to get this done. So figure out what that is for you. Again, for the things that you are really not feeling like doing it. And on the days that you're really, really feeling low on motivation.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Now, what can you do if you feel like, Okay, this is not a habit yet. There's probably gonna be a chance [00:20:00] that I am not gonna be able to keep this up. Like, what can I do to increase my chances of maintaining it or to get back on it if I fall off track now? Um, the first thing is like, plan in advance for whatever you think is the thing that's gonna get in the way of you.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: incorporating this ritual. So let me bring up the example of my client, the one that I'm thinking of, um, who requested this topic. So in her case, she noticed that every time she was dreading doing her work, she would open up YouTube. And I told her, Oh, that's really interesting. I'm curious if there's anything that you can do to pair with this habit of opening up YouTube.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So that way, You can give yourself some sort of cutoff time with YouTube and transition into this ritual, transition into this thing that you're going to do that's going to help you to get started on the work that you're avoiding. [00:21:00] And so we were just exploring some, some options and some of the things that she's going to test out include the, the pre writing or, um, what was it?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Or some grounding exercises and see what helps her out. But in her case, she already had an existing habit that maybe wasn't helpful for her, but she's going to pair it with this unhelpful habit. So that way, it helps to reduce that habit and hopefully eventually she can replace it. Now you don't have to pair it with an unhelpful habit.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: You can pair it with a habit that you already have that actually is a good habit or a helpful habit or Something that you know you're going to do no matter what. It could be, you know, every time, every morning, after you brush your teeth, you do X, or every time, every morning, after you do your morning walk, you do Y, or every time in the afternoon, after lunch, you're going to do Z, [00:22:00] or every time, I don't know, if you're an evening worker, after dinner, you're you know, before you do your evening shift, um, you're going to do X, Y, and Z.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So just keep note of that, of um,

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: so aside from pairing this new ritual with your pre existing habit, whether it's helpful or hurtful, another thing that you can do is something that I've referenced earlier, which is starting off really, really small, making it as small as possible, as easy as possible, so that way it doesn't feel like this.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Extra added burden, this extra added thing you have to do and it can just feel easy. It can feel simple. It can feel manageable, doable. So Make it small, make [00:23:00] it tiny and then build up gradually to an amount of time that feels good for you Um, or to an intensity that feels good for you. It just depends on what you're doing Um And then also make sure that you make it easy for yourself with visual cues, setting up reminders, and being flexible with yourself because I don't think it's realistic to expect you to completely overhaul the habits that you've already built.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So if you've already built this habit of, I get easily distracted and I avoid things that are really hard for me, it's not going to be an overnight thing for you to all of a sudden be able to like, hyper focused right away. It's not, it's a work in progress. And also, I also run into this with some of my clients where they're really, really hard on themselves.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: It's almost like a black or black and white thinking of like, there's just so much rigidity. Like I have to do everything in this way because if not, everything else is going to just [00:24:00] go to, I have to do everything in this way because otherwise everything else is going is going to fall apart if I don't do it exactly in this way.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: And that's not necessarily true. If you can embrace flexibility, if you can give yourself room to try new things out, if you can adjust things, eventually you're going to find something that works. And that's the whole thing about, you know, why I teach productivity strategies is that for me, productivity is about execution, and functioning and finding ways to live your life that ideally reduce harm, that ideally make things less hard, less painful, more easeful, more enjoyable.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: And that's what I want for you. If I can get you to identify a ritual that you can do before doing the thing that you're dreading, before prepping for exams, before working on your dissertation, before you working on [00:25:00] this really big project. If I can get you to do that and then eventually make it simpler, make it easeful, make it Enjoyable, oof, then my job here is done.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: So that's really what I wanted to talk about today. I wanted to introduce you to this idea of setting intentional rituals to help you with focusing on the things that you're really struggling to work on. I want you to start thinking about. Thinking about your unique triggers, the things that really get to you and that come up for you a lot, that get in the way of you focusing.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: And I want you to identify, come up with some rituals. It could be some things that I mentioned, it could be something completely different, but figure out what is the ritual that you want to try out to incorporate before you start this work that's historically been hard for you to get started on. And then lastly, I want you to be open, to try new things, to be flexible, to take risks.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: To, [00:26:00] um, adjust things as needed and to yeah, give yourself permission to.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Yeah. At the end of the day, I just want you to be flexible with it, to give yourself permission to adjust as needed, and eventually you're gonna find a thing that works. That's it for this episode. I hope you found it helpful, and as always, I will talk to you all next time. Bye bye.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: Thanks so much for joining me in the Grad School Femtoring Podcast. If you like what you heard, here are four ways you can support the show. The first is to make sure you're subscribed and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. If you email me a screenshot, I'll send you a surprise freebie. The second way is to get your copy of my free Grad School Femtoring Resource Kit.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: which includes essential information to prepare [00:27:00] for and navigate grad school. You can access it at the link in today's show notes. The third way to support my show is to follow me on social media. You can find me on Instagram with the handle at grad school, femtoring and on LinkedIn by searching my name.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu: The last way to show your love is to order a copy of is grad school for me. My graduate school admissions book for first gen BIPOCs. Thanks again for listening and until next time.