223: Two Calendaring Tasks for Growth and Wellbeing

223: Two Calendaring Tasks for Growth and Wellbeing

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[00:00:00] Welcome back everyone, to another episode of the Grad School Femtoring podcast. This is your host, Doctora Yvette. I thought I'd start out by saying, Feliz Ano Nuevo, happy New Year. This is the first episode of 2024 you might have noticed that this is a bit of a shorter episode, and also it is coming out on a different day of the week.

What is up? Right? Well, let me tell you what I have in store for 2024 for this podcast. One thing that I noticed when I was doing some, reflecting on my podcasting goals, milestones of 2023, is I noticed that . I have been ranked, as, , one of the, what is within the top 10% most shared and most followed podcasts, , [00:01:00] on Spotify.

But then I also found out that the podcast is in the top 3% globally, and I found that interesting because I thought to myself, well, I only release one episode a week, but I've been pretty consistent. And we can talk about consistency another time. When I say consistent, I mean I release something every week.

even if I've recorded it months in advance or I've batched it, or I've decided to release a replay of a very popular episode, but no matter what you can expect to hear from me every Friday on the dot, there will be an episode out. So I've been pretty consistent since 2019, and there have been some times that I've shifted things.

So, for instance, when was it? It might have been in 2020 when I was on maternity [00:02:00] leave. I reduced the frequency from once every week to once every other week because I was on maternity leave and I re, I prerecorded those episodes and released them every two weeks until my maternity leave was up.

Then there was one time that I started releasing. short episodes on Wednesdays and longer episodes on Fridays, and I was able to keep it up. I actually really liked that. I liked that approach of short episodes on Wednesdays, and, some of them were q and a episodes and longer episodes on Fridays, but at some point it was no longer sustainable. And so I went back to once a week.

Now I feel like I've got a really good workflow and I want to reach certain milestones with my book coming out, one milestone is I wanna reach the 100 K. Listen, mark [00:03:00] and . 100 K may seem arbitrary, but, , the reason why I wanna increase my numbers is because, one, I want more people to find out about my work, to find out about my book, and to benefit from my resources, whether they're the free resources I offer, or the paid resources I offer.

Either one works because the free stuff is there because I believe in accessibility. And I want, I, I love knowing that people benefit from my resources e even if they never meet me. The other thing is that. I'm also going to be offering paid services. I am an entrepreneur. I am supporting my family, and I no longer have shame about that.

I need to pay my bills and I have financial goals I want to reach, and I believe in the work that I do. And so that's why I also offer paid services to folks that want to support my work in that way. But don't feel bad. [00:04:00] If you can't support my work in a financial way, you listening to this episode is you supporting my work and for that I also appreciate you.

So what do I have in store for 2024? I am going to test out a trial period of releasing short episodes every Wednesday. In fact, as I record this, I'm a little bit nervous to say it out loud because once I say something out loud, it's that performative aspect of it, and by. Performative here. I'm talking about performativity.

from a theoretical sense from my graduate school training, not performative in the way that we are used to hearing that word of like performative allyship of just this very fake, superficial way. I mean performative as in the utterance and saying it out loud makes it truth, like the performative aspect of telling someone, , you are now [00:05:00] husband and wife for instance. Uh, when someone has a a wedding ceremony, the utterance of that makes it truth. So that's how I feel about saying things out loud. In fact, that's actually a great strategy for forcing yourself to do something if you really, really wanna reach a goal.

I forgot what the odds are, but stats prove that you saying it out loud substantially increase your odds of reaching that goal, even if it's a big, scary, lofty goal. So for me this year, I would love for my book Is Grad School For Me? Demystifying the Application Process for First-Gen BIPOC Students. I would love for this book to become a bestseller.

And I would also love for it to become a perennial bestseller. I want it to be a bestseller year after year after year. And you know, admittedly, this is [00:06:00] an academic book published through an academic press, so it's, it's not this exact same process as a traditionally published book, but, nonetheless,

I still want it to be a bestseller, even if it's just a bestseller within the press, within UC Press. I want it to be a bestseller, and it's not just for the bragging rights of saying blah, blah, blah. I'm a, I'm a bestselling author. No, I mean, I am a co-editor of a bestselling anthology, and it is nice to say that out loud, but the reason why I want it to be a bestseller is because

I don't understand why this book isn't out there already. I don't understand why someone else didn't write it. Why did it have to be me? I've had this book in my head since [00:07:00] 2008, nine. . That was when I first started conducting undergraduate research, and I thought to myself, why isn't there a book for this?

Why isn't there a book that's teaching me all these things? And all the books that I found that were related to it, I could not relate to them at all. I didn't see myself in the stories. I could not relate. I couldn't even finish those books. And so now my book is coming out and I want more people to find out about it.

And how can I do that by using my platform and what's my favorite platform that I have? It's my podcast. Yes, I am on social media, but I have a love-hate relationship with social media. I haven't given up entirely on social media because. , there are some benefits. I love the people that I've been able to meet thanks to social media.

I love that people have been able [00:08:00] to find me and my work thanks to social media. I don't love social media content creation. I don't like having to be on social media 24 7 and engage all the time with people. It's very draining for me, but because I see that the benefits outweigh the costs. I'm engaging in social media within my boundaries, so I'm not gonna be the person with the most likes and the most follows because that is not a metric that I personally am invested in at this time.

I may be invested in it later on in my career, who knows? But right now the metric that matters most for me. In my business, has to do with my podcast and it has to do with how many books we're able to sell, how many lives we're able to touch my co-author and I by writing this book, by [00:09:00] publishing it and releasing it out as an offering in ofrenda to the world.

So that's kind of my. a little bit of a rant, but my reasoning behind why I am going to test out releasing short episodes every Wednesday. That's the goal for now, short episodes, and they're gonna be . You know, tips, anything that comes to mind. Anything new that I'm learning, anything that comes up in my coaching sessions, but something short and sweet that I can share with you on Wednesdays.

And then Fridays, I'm gonna continue my usual routine of alternating between a solo episode and a guest episode. So for now, you can expect to continue to have, . Two guest episodes every month, every other Friday, and now it's gonna be six solo episodes, which I'm excited about because I love recording this podcast.[00:10:00]

Um, technically recording a podcast is a form of content creation, so it's gonna help me with sharing this work on social media to continue to have a presence on social media and gain the benefits that I love about it, which again, is connecting with humans, awesome humans at that, and also reaching potential, um, femtees clients, folks who can support my work and also help me pay my bills.

So that's just me keeping it real. Okay, so there's that. Today's shorty episode is not too short, but because of my, my whole, um, background info leading up to it. But today's shorty episode is on the topic of two caling calendaring tasks that you can do today to promote your growth and wellbeing. So I am one of those people that I feel like I am living proof of what I preach.

[00:11:00] I practice what I preach. So a lot of the things that I share with you are things that I have done myself that have helped me. And if they work for you, great. If they don't, no worries. You know, not everything is for everyone. And I might share a tip or trick next episode that might work for you. So this is something that I just recently did.

, I went to my calendar and I did the following two things. First, I blocked out. . All the time that I'm gonna take off. And I mean, you only have some control of your calendar. , if you're someone who is a full-time employee or a full-time student, there's only so much you can do to control your calendar.

But whatever is within your control schedule out. So schedule out some time off. In my case, I no longer work for . An employer or an institution that mandates time off? You know, when I worked in higher ed, I knew [00:12:00] that I was at least gonna have either time off or downtime during spring break and during the week before summer term starts, and during the week before fall term starts.

And during the two weeks, um, in December before . The winter or before January starts, so I knew I had that downtime or break time no matter what. I no longer have that. And if you're a busy grad student, especially a dissertating grad student who's no longer taking courses, the same is true for you. Only you can schedule your downtime, and I recommend.

Scheduling out some time off, whatever feels good for you. Some people block out a couple days before a long weekend so they can get longer time off. Some people will block out a full week off. I'm blocking out a week off or close to a week off, or at least five days off at the end of each term.

And that doesn't [00:13:00] mean I'm taking it completely off. There are days I'm gonna be completely do nothing rest. There will also be times that I'm doing admin work, like catch up work, assessment work reflecting work. So that's the time that I'm giving myself for that. .

The other thing is I've made it a practice that I no longer work on my birthdays. I just don't, this started many, many years ago. I've probably said it on the show before, but I once had a supervisor, a really lovely, amazing supervisor, um, at UCLA, um,

My supervisor at the Scholarship Resource Center. It's not called that now, but those of y'all that are familiar with the resource center over there, you know who I'm talking about. She is dope. I love her. She was the one that would give us our birthdays off and she gave us paid time off on our birthdays.

So I love that she made that a tradition for herself and then for all of her employees. And since then I've made [00:14:00] it a thing. , I take the day off and if I can, I take my husband's . Birthday off, and if I can, I take at least a half day off on my kids' birthdays and I get it. Sometimes we have no control.

We can't take a full day off, we can't day a half day off. But what can you do to give yourself extra time during momentous occasions? Maybe they're anniversaries, maybe birthdays, whatever the thing is that you want to celebrate. Put it on your calendar because reward systems, celebrations, those are things that we live for.

Those are motivating things. Those are the gonna be the things that keep you going, helping you to even reach your goals. So there's that. So that's the first thing.

The second thing I do, uh, for my calendar and that I did this year is I added end of month check-ins. So I mentioned before that I hosted a end of year [00:15:00] reflection and planning workshop to really kind of reflect and plan on, reflect on 2023, plan for 2024. So, set, set my annual intentions and goals, but this time around I wanna be more intentional about carving some time and I carved out a two hour block at the end of each month. In my case, I think I chose

Wednesday or Thursday afternoons at the end of each month, you can decide whatever time block works best for you. But I reserve that time and I'm gonna go back to take a look at my annual goals and see where am I standing according to these goals. Do the goals still make sense? Sometimes you might shift gears midway.

, you might change your mind on the goals that you set at the end of January. At the end of July. Who knows? So I am intentionally setting aside time at the end of each month to reflect on how that month [00:16:00] went and play catch up. 'cause it might be a month or two while that I, even though it's on my calendar, it might not happen.

You know, because life happens for me. Flare ups happen. Stuff with my kids can happen, so if it doesn't happen each and every month, that's okay. I can play catch up the next month. That's kind of how I do my personal budgeting system as well. . Every month at the, at the last weekend of every month, my husband and I sit down and we take a look at our budget, take a look at where we stand.

Are we still within our budget? Are we over budget? Are we under budget? Do we need to change things? Um, do we need to tighten some things? Do we need to try to make more income? You know, look, whatever it is that comes up, we take a look at it at the end of the month, and I'm not gonna lie, we have had months.

That we're like, whoop, I don't know what happened, but we didn't have that meeting and we'll play catch up the next month. Um, but it's still on our calendar and we still are [00:17:00] pretty good at doing it almost every month, with the exception of a month or two. That might be especially busy for us. Those are the two things that I recommend.

Again, putting aside some time off, some time for . Rest and nourishment sometime to do some of that catchup work. Admin tasks, things that you normally kind of put on the side and don't have time for. I'm thinking here. Also task, not just admin tasks. Sometimes even de decluttering. I know I did some decluttering this holiday break time.

Uh, I don't know what parent doesn't do this. 'cause you get a bunch of . Toys, . I was about to say, you get a bunch of crap for your kids, but I don't wanna sound ungrateful. , you get a bunch of, , really thoughtful gifts from, from loved ones that, , require that you make space for them. So yeah, [00:18:00] keep that in mind.

And then also don't forget to make some time. For your reflecting, checking in on your goals and making some modifications as needed. Okay, that was it. That was my ,., Calendaring tasks that you can do to promote growth and wellbeing this year. And I'll catch you all this Friday for my next. . Guest or longer solo episode.

Thanks so much for listening, and I'll talk to y'all next time.,