19: Navigating UC Berkeley as a Low-Income, First-Gen, Pregnant Student of Color with Cecilia Caballero

19: Navigating UC Berkeley as a Low-Income, First-Gen, Pregnant Student of Color with Cecilia Caballero

In this episode, Cecilia Caballero shares her journey navigating UC Berkeley as a low-income, first-gen, pregnant student of color.

Cecilia Caballero is a Afro-Chicana single mother-scholar-poet. She is the mother of a ten year old boy, Alonzo, who was born during her time as an undergraduate student. She is a Ph.D. Candidate in the Department of American Studies and Ethnicity at the University of Southern California. She also holds BAs in English and ChicanxStudies from UC Berkeleyand an AA in Liberal Arts from Los Medanos Community College.

Her dissertation focuses on narratives of Chicana mothering, feminism, gender, sexuality, and spiritual activism in Chicana literature and cultural production and her next creative project focuses on the intersections between Black and Chicana feminist speculative theory in the works of Octavia Butler and Gloria Anzaldua.Cecilia is co-founder of the Chicana M(other)work collective and is co-editor of the

Chicana M(other)work Anthology: Porque Sin Madres No Hay Revolucion. She is also an essayist, poet, and creative writer and is founder of the Bookworm Por Vida podcast and project which celebrates BIPOC literature for liberation. Please tune in to learn more from her experiences and advice.

Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/yvette14/message

Check out other episodes: https://gradschoolfemtoring.com/podcast/

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Hello, everyone. Happy Friday. I am here, excited to bring you a brand new episode with a special guest. Before I introduce her or get started, I wanted to give you a quick announcement. First off is, you might notice that I have moved the publication time of the episodes. Instead of publishing the episodes on Sunday mornings, I am going to be publishing them, likely Thursday at midnight, or Friday around midnight, 1am. That way, Friday morning, as soon as you get up, if you're getting ready in the morning, you can listen to the episode. If you're commuting somewhere, you can listen to the episode. If you have a study break or a lunch break, again, you can listen to me then. I did put out a poll on Instagram to ask my listeners if you have any preference on what day and time to publish it, and Friday seemed to be a popular day. That's the reason why I've changed the episode publication dates.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

The other thing I want to do is remind you that I am still taking listener reviews. If you go to your iTunes podcast app, you can go ahead and leave a three, four or five star review in a comment. I will be selecting and reading comments each episode. And whoever leaves a comment-as soon as I read your comment aloud, feel free to email me and you'll get a special prize. Last time I mentioned that the person that that left the comment could receive a free CV templates. Well, this time, I have more goodies to offer, because I'm feeling really grateful and generous. And so you get to choose one of the following things if I read your comment,your listener review, on my podcast. You can choose between a CV template- this is a template with all the different sections that you need to write a good CV. It's already formatted for you. You can have a copy of a grad school list template. This is an Excel sheet with all the columns that you need to fill out so that you can have a strong graduate school list. You can choose also between a Statement of Purpose prewriting handout- this is a handout that I created with specific questions for you to answer. If you answer all of those questions, you'll have everything that you need to write a strong statement of purpose for grad school. And then the last option is a self care and stress management PowerPoint. It's a PowerPoint that I put together to come up with ideas for you to learn more about- what is self care? What is stress? How to implement it, how to manage your stress on a regular basis. So again, you've got those four options- CV template, grad school list template, Statement of Purpose, prewriting handout, or a self care and stress management PowerPoint.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

All right, so today, I am going to be reading another listener review. This one is by Kua12. And they said, this podcast has helped me see gain better insight into what I need to prepare my graduate applications. Great. I'm so glad to hear that, because sometimes I wonder if I'm being helpful. It's always nice to know that people appreciate and are learning from from what I'm saying. So thank you so much. Kua12, if you're listening right now, shoot me an email. Choose one of the four options, and I will send you that resource.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

All right, so without further further ado, let's go on to the segment for today which is my special guest speaker. I have a special treat for you. I have my first guest on the show. I guess I can call her my guest co host. She's my friend. She's an amazing fierce mama scholar. I'm actually gonna just go ahead and introduce her to you, and then let her share a little bit more about her journey as a low income, first gen,student of color. Now graduate student, single mom, where she's at and any advice she wants to share with you all.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Here's her bio. Cecilia Caballero is an Afro-Chicana single mother scholar poet. She's the mother of a 10 year old boy Alonso, who was born during her time as an undergraduate student. She is a PhD candidate in the department of American Studies and Ethnicity at the University of Southern California. She also holds BAs in English and Chicanx Studies from UC Berkeley and an AA in liberal arts from Los Medanos Community College. Her dissertation focuses on narratives of Chicana mothering, feminism, gender, sexuality and spiritual activism in Chicana literature and cultural production. Her next creative project focuses on the intersections between black and Chicana feminist speculative theory in the works of Octavia Butler, and Gloria Anzaldúa. Cecilia is the co-founder of the Chicano Mother Work collective, and is a co editor of the Chicano Mother Work Anthology- "Porque Sin Madres, No Hay Revolucion." She is also an essayist, poet and creative writer, and is the founder of the Bookworm Por Vida podcast, which I gave a shout out in two episodes ago. And this is a project in which she celebrates BIPOC literature for liberation. So welcome to the show, Ceci. I'm so excited to have you here.

Cecilia Caballero

Thanks so much for having me. It's definitely been- we've known each other for a long time.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yes, yes. We have. I don't even want to get started on how long, because we have our inside joke of I have a bad memory, I don't remember-

Cecilia Caballero

She doesn't remember when we first became friends. That's okay, I guess.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

So Ceci, if you can just tell us a little bit more about your backstory. Who you are, where you're from, and you know, your trajectory up to this point.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, so there- where do I start? Well, I think first, I can just share what my positionality is, which is first gen, low income, daughter of immigrants. I think it's just common for a lot of us who are children of immigrants, or whose parents are poor- and my parents, they only have a sixth grade education- so my parents, when they came here to California from Michoacán, they did encourage me to go to school. I remember my dad talking, and he would always encourage me and say, you know, don't work with your hands like I do, because he was a farm worker and construction laborer. And I love school, so as soon as I learned to read, I was just devouring books, and I still do. So I loved school, and by the time I got to high school, I started having the awareness that maybe this isn't for me. I think part of that was just that internalized racism, just classism. Because my family was really poor, and in high school I started working, and I gave most of my income to my parents, I felt like, oh, I have to stay. Or I can't move away. It wasn't even in my consciousness that it was even an option to move away, or even move far away. I limited myself, but I didn't realize that at the time.

Cecilia Caballero

So in high school, I didn't apply to any four year colleges. Actually, at the time, my high school didn't even have college counselors. They had the vice principal take that job. I was really confused. I didn't know what the A through G requirements were, and I was really bad at math. I was scared of standardized testing, and I didn't take the SATs. I just remember thinking to myself in high school, well, I'm not going to college. It's not for me. It's for people who have more money, or white people. But that's just because I had such a lack of resources. What I did instead was I went to community college, and I did that for three years. During that time, I worked full time and went to school full time, three or four classes a semester. And I loved it, but I was still living at home. I remember very specifically, even though I was doing well in my classes, I still kind of had those limiting, internalized limiting limited beliefs, where I was just thinking- I remember thinking to myself, like, oh, well, these good schools, they're for other people. They're not for me. And it just so happened that I happened to meet with a transfer counselor, just by accident, because I just kind of wandered into the office one day. And the counselor I met with just happened to be Chicana, and that surprised me because I was just not used to seeing someone who resembled me in any of my public school teachers, K through 12, or, or even at the community college level. So I was surprised when I saw this Chicana woman, who kind of looked like me, telling me that I could go to different kinds of -or apply to different kinds of four year institutions. I thought that I was just going to apply to the CSUs- the California State University system in California. And there's nothing wrong with those schools. But the issue was that I didn't even envision myself at a place like Berkeley or Stanford or an Ivy League. And not that those are, you know, "the best schools" either, but I just was not exposed to this information.

Cecilia Caballero

And again, I wanted to stay close to home because I just thought that oh, well, I need to help support my family. At that time, I couldn't make the decision to move away, or I felt like I couldn't, because I was kind of, well, now I would call it -thanks to therapy- enmeshment with my family, which can be unhealthy. But at the time, I just felt like I had no other option, like I had to stay close. So the the college counselor, she said, well, she looked at my grades and she said, well, you can apply to not just the CSUss but the UC system, the University of California system. She said, maybe you could even go to Berkeley like I did. That just totally blew my mind because I had never met a Chicana who graduated from a place like Berkeley. And she helped me enroll in a transfer program, and I did that. So then I was admitted to Berkeley, which was absolutely, just so far beyond my imagination. It's the number one ranked public institution in the country. And I came into Berkeley and at first, I came in as an English major because I loved literature. Even at community college, I remember at the time, there wasn't even an English major. I don't know why. The next closest thing was liberal arts, so that's why my AAs is in liberal arts, because that was the closest kind of humanities degree that I could find.

Cecilia Caballero

So when I came into Berkeley, as an English major junior transfer, I didn't realize that an English degree meant reading the white English canon. And it was just not relevant to me. A lot of it was boring. A lot of it was racist. I felt excluded in many ways. Not just from what was taught on the syllabus, but also even from professors, some professors. And it was through- I didn't have any clue what was going on my first semester there. But I was also still commuting, because my parents lived in Northern California. I would just go to class- I kind of arranged my classes- I would just be there during the day, so I'd arrive in the morning on BART, the public transportation.

Cecilia Caballero

So I do feel, looking back on it, I do feel that I kind of missed out on that college experience because I never got to live in a dorm or kind of have more of that sense of independence. But in my first semester, I felt like I didn't belong at all, which also was my experience when I came into the PhD later. But then slowly over time, I got to know people in my classes, and I really connected with- who were able to share more resources with me. I also connected with one professor who also was interested in Chicano literature, or he is a professor of Chicano literature, and he recognized my passion for it. He was the one to encourage me to apply for the Mellon Mays undergraduate fellowship. So that year- and even that, I felt intimidated to apply. You know, again, that imposter syndrome of just like, oh, I'm not even good enough. It was kind of like the common theme that I struggled with, and actually, I still struggle with now in different ways. But even back then, even though my professor was encouraging me to apply to this program, I thought to myself, well, I'm not good enough. It's for other people. Other people will get it. I won't get it. That's also where I learned what a PhD even was, and that it was even possible to have a career as a professor and study books for a living, right. All of this was just mind blowing to me. And I did apply, and I did get it- the fellowship. And that's where I met Yvette for the first time, even though she doesn't remember.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yeah I only remember grad school times.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, so that's where Yvette and I first met. It was the first regional- not the first. I don't think it was the first, but it was the regional undergraduate conference for Mellon Mays undergraduate students, and she was -Yvette was a Melon at UCLA as an undergraduate, and I was at UC Berkeley as an undergraduate. And the conference was at Stanford, right?

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yeah, that I can remember.

Cecilia Caballero

You just don't remember me? I see how it is.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Only because that's on my CV. I don't remember what happened. Who knows what I did back then.

Cecilia Caballero

Let's just say you were being a nerd. We'll keep it at that. But by that time- it was really through Mellon where- and the McNair is also a similar program, where you get funding to do research. You get to go to conferences. That's also where I was- it was my first time presenting at a conference, and preparing a conference paper, networking, meeting other melons, especially the other first generation, students of color. And I love the program. I love Mellon for those reasons. And I actually, I also remember that first conference that I went to- or actually that was the first ever conference I went to, the Mellon Mays regional conference, when I was an undergrad. Yeah, and I also remember it because I was pregnant at the time. And I- no that was in, it was Halloween I remember. So that was like the end of October.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yeah, it was a fall conference. It must have been October. Yeah.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, so then November, December, January, and my son was born in January. Yeah. And I remember that I went shopping. That was another part, where I was just like, oh, I don't know what to wear to a conference. You know, like, what? I have to look professional or what does that mean? And I went to Target. I'm like, where do I go? I don't know. I went to Target. Well, I still like Target. I remember you told me you were excited that they were finally opening a target there. Right? Yes.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yes, becuase where I live there was not a target for three years of my life. Oh, my gosh, how did I survive? Anyways, you're in Target.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, and I remember I was trying to pick out a shirt that kind of was flowy, because also being a mom, a first time mom, but also while I was an undergraduate, while also planning to do this PhD thing and while managing- because I was having difficulties with my parents. At first, they were just upset at me or not as supportive when I first learned that I was pregnant. So I was navigating all these things. So I'm just like, well, I'm gonna solve my problems by going to target and finding a flowy shirt that kind of hides it. Yeah, I remember thinking like, oh, I don't want to necessarily show off being pregnant, because I still felt kind of uncomfortable being in these kinds of spaces while pregnant. I found this purple - I remember it was this purple, button up kind of flowy top. And I was like, oh, this will work. That's also the conference where I met our friend Esther, who is now a professor, but she was also part of Yvette's Mellon Mays cohort from UCLA.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yup, we're part of the first cohort.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, and that's also where I first met Esther. I remember years later I told her, I said- oh yeah, I remember that when I went up there to give my presentation, I remember that I was thinking about how I felt relieved that I was hiding my pregnancy. I didn't want that to be the focus point, or I was still kind of worried about what people might say. I mean now, I don't care. But at the time, I was still kind of figuring everything out. And then Esther was just like, oh no, I could tell. I noticed. I'm like, there goes was my plan, that just obviously didn't work. I guess it was obvious that I was pregnant, but I just, I don't know- I had it in my mind that I wasn't showing to that extent yet. But apparently, I was.

Cecilia Caballero

But yeah, so the story-my trajectory, a large part of it does have to do with having a child as an undergraduate. AI remember the summer before, I was doing a summer research opportunity program. So these are programs- I don't know if you've talked about those programs on the show yet, Yvette.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

No, I haven't devoted an episode to it. But thank you. That's a good reminder.

Cecilia Caballero

Yes, programs that you can- there's the Leadership Alliance program. Then a lot of institutions individually host what they call SORP, so the summer research opportunity program. It's intended for underrepresented students to gain research experience. So my SORP experience, I just did a program at Berkeley, even though I was a student at Berkeley. But it worked out, because I was still able to work with my mentor- the mentor I already had. But I remember, I found out that I was pregnant maybe a day or two before that program started. So I had already planned. I was like, well, I have these books. This is my topic. I'm going to do this, and this is preparation for me to apply to Ph.D programs, which I was planning to do that following fall. Then I found out I was pregnant, which was unplanned. And I did have a lot of complex feelings about it, and just a lot of fear. Even from my family, having people doubt me. It was really hurtful that there wasn't that sense of celebration, or people being happy for me. It was more just like, oh, you did something you weren't supposed to do. And now this is going to- now you messed up your one chance to succeed, or whatever that means.

Cecilia Caballero

So it was really hurtful, but I was able to get support from- I had a grad student mentor, Marisol, who, when I first met her, I was not a mother yet. But I remember when she shared her story with me, when I first met her- or this is when I first transferred to Berkeley- she shared with me that she was an undergraduate student mother at an Ivy League, and she was Chicana, first gen. Now she was doing a PhD here at UC Berkeley. I remember I was thinking, wow, that's just an amazing story, because you don't often hear or see these kinds of narratives anywhere, really. So I was just so impressed with Marisol. Then when I found out I was pregnant- I think it was a year or two later-she was one of the first people I told. She was actually one of the first people who did congratulate me and was happy for me. It meant so much to me. Then also just knowing- seeing her modeling how she did it, even though she also had a lot of challenges. But she was able to access different resources, get different kinds of support and help, and she finished her bachelor's degree and then moved on to the PhD so. At Berkeley specifically, there's also something called the Student Parent Center. I also went there, and I had resources. I received resources such as- and I wish to all schools would do this actually, no matter where you go to school- that they gave you a block grant. All you had to do was just show proof that you were a parent, so they just asked for your child's birth certificate. From that, they gave you a block rent every semester. I think it was two or three thousand dollars a semester, which was a lot.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Wow.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, it really just helped.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Grad students get- here at UCSB, grad students- $500 per quarter. That's only if they're an academic student employee. If they're not employed, they don't get that childcare reimbursement. And you have to show proof of childcare, which is very frustrating to me. Because I'm like $500 is not enough. I mean, it's something but it's not enough. On top of that, if you're not employed on campus, if you have a fellowship, they don't cover you.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, so it's just there's certain stipulations or restrictions that you have to meet in order to access some of these grants, just depending on where you are. I think at Berkeley there have been some faculty working for, I would say, a couple of decades now. The Student Parent Center started- I think it's been 20 years at least. So maybe because there, there is a longer history. But it should ideally be a uniform kind of thing throughout the UCs, right. I'm not sure why that's not the case.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yeah.

Cecilia Caballero

But even at USC, the only funds that they offer for graduate student parents- I don't think, I haven't even heard anything for undergraduate student parents- but for graduate student parents at USC, you also have to demonstrate- you get reimbursed so that means you pay for it first, and then you show the receipts. Then the restriction is that they only fund it from preschool age, so before the children enter kindergarten. Then you have to show proof that you pay that they go to a childcare center, and then they give you $1,000 or something. But that leaves out the rest of us who have kids older than five, and some people don't go to the centers, because they're so expensive. So they don't take - if you have a babysitter, that doesn't count in order to qualify for this grant. So it's just pretty- it's pointless for me, so I haven't gotten any support as a student parent in that sense at USC.

Cecilia Caballero

But, so I was able to access some resources at the time at UC Berkeley, and that really helped. Another thing that I did was the Institute for the Recruitment of Teachers, which is a program. I think it's a national program, so it's just open to any college student. It was really helpful, because what they do is that they have staff that's just dedicated. They pair you with one person, and they help you go and create your drafts of your personal statement, your statement of purpose. They help you figure out which programs to apply to, and then I think part of the requirements of IRT, I think they require you to submit two applications to 10 schools or something like that. Which is actually helpful, because you just kind of- I've heard the phrase, you just want to cast a wide net, like you never know what's going to happen, who's going to admit you or what kind of funding package offer you'll get. Then that really helped.

Cecilia Caballero

But I graduated, but then I took a year off, because I knew I wanted to spend time with my son. I knew -I just heard from so many graduate students and other people that once you get in to a Ph.D program, then you're in, and it's kind of very difficult to have any sense of balance or whatever. What does a balance even mean, in terms of school and family? So I knew I want to take a year off because my son was still so young. Then in the meantime, I worked as a substitute teacher. I was a tutor, and I just kind of did random jobs around education, that area. But it was flexible, so I still had time with my son. Then I applied that fall for PhD programs, even though I wasn't in school.

Cecilia Caballero

I remember thinking to myself like, oh well, I'll just see what happens. And if I don't get in, I'll just apply the following year. Let's just see how it goes. And I did get in. I got into three programs, then I picked USC. Yeah, and I picked USC. For me, the decision came down, mostly because of the financial offer that I got from USC, which was the most out of the other two schools. Even though it was in LA and I was in Northern California, I felt like I just couldn't turn down the offer. I think it was also two years of fellowship, which meant no teaching. I think they've increased it to three years fellowship now, so if anyone wants to apply to USC, definitely apply. I think they have-I think the stipends are even more now. I think USC, they want to be more competitive That was really the biggest reason that I came to USC, and I think that's such a first gen kind of thing. I didn't want to go into debt. I didn't want to teach every single semester. Luckily, I was able to do that, to get what I wanted with USC, which made things easier. Especially being a single mom and I moved away from home. I didn't know anyone in LA, and I also had just went through a breakup. The summer right before I moved to LA is when I split with my son's dad. Looking back on it, I don't know how I did it.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I know.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, I had such a little support, and I would not advise students to do anything like that. But I made it work somehow.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Wow. We're getting close to the time. I know that you've already kind of shared resources along the way, at least the things that you were able to navigate in undergrad. I wanted to maybe just have you on for another minute or two, if you have any advice to offer to our listeners. They're mostly a combination of undergraduate students who are learning about, or maybe preparing their graduate applications. Or folks who have taken some time off, and I'm looking to kind of get back to thinking about grad school. So if you have any tips or advice, life lessons, additional things that you want to share with them.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, I would say, research your institutions or departments as much as you can. What ended up happening with me is that I came into USC as an English PhD- in the English Ph. D program- and then after a year, I switched over to the American Studies PhD. Part of that was, there is just more faculty and faculty of color to work with in the American Studies Department. So it's okay if you- if you do do research, and you get there and you feel like it's not the best fit for you, you can always change. There's no shame about it. I mean, sometimes you do have to navigate certain kinds of politics, but it's definitely doable. It's not something that will be held against you or anything. It's actually pretty common. And then the way to do that usually is that probably the best information that you'll get will be from the current graduate students. Even if you just- even having a conversation or even if you ask them,what is their research on? How do they like the department or how do they like living in that city or wherever that program is? Even just the way that students respond, I think will just give you a lot of information.

Cecilia Caballero

Another thing to be careful about is some institutions can be toxic. If people are just unhappy, that does have an effect on physical health, mental health. But then the other thing about that is no department is perfect. Because of that, just trying to gather, build community as much as you can. So, of course working with Yvette- so Yvette and I work on and are in the Chicana Mother Work Collective. I remember also- I think when we first started grad school, me and Yvette, and I think it was Esther too. I think we had a group, a book club meeting on the book, "Presumed Incompetent: the Intersections of Race and Class for Women in Academia." Yeah, so even if it's just- and we were in different places, so we just did it online, the book club meeting. So even if you don't have people near you, physically, you can do something like that. Just the more people you have on your back, the more people who have your back, the better. I think that's pretty much all I can think of for now.

Cecilia Caballero

Nice. All right. I want to thank you for your time. Thank you for sharing your story and providing invaluable advice to my listeners. With that, I'm gonna let you go. Hopefully, maybe we'll have you again in the near future, if you have any other topics you'd like to cover.

Cecilia Caballero

Yeah, thank you. Of course. I would love that.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

All right, Ceci. Thanks so much. I'll talk to you soon.

Cecilia Caballero

Okay, thanks. Bye.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

That was Cecilia Caballero. I hope that you enjoyed and learned a lot from her. Now, I am going to be transitioning to the next segment, which is listener questions. So every once in a while, if I get listener questions via Instagram DM or over email, I'm going to be dedicating a little bit of time to answering those questions. Then of course, I'm going to end the podcast episode with a shout out.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

So let's talk about this week's listener questions. I received a few questions from a listener named Morgan. She wants to know what to look for in a program? What questions to ask when considering certain life circumstances, such as living with chronic illness? Do I disclose my chronic illness during the interview process ir not address it at all? I have health mostly managed- so I'm assuming health concerns- I mostly managed it, but will experience debilitating symptoms every once in a while. My rule of thumb has always been to be upfront with everyone about my physical needs. However, I know oversharing is very risky. The other question she has is how to bring my partner into my grad school search plans, especially when it would mean relocating? Then finally, her third question is CV or resume? I've seen options to send either, but is one more beneficial over the other?

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Okay, let's talk about the first question, because I can actually relate to that a lot. I suffer from a number of different chronic illnesses. And I suffered through them in graduate school without getting proper accommodations. That's something that I wish I would have done. It would have helped me manage my symptoms much more. I think part of it was it was hard for me to even come to terms with it, because I developed my chronic health issues in grad school during my second year, near the end of my second year of grad school. And so for this, I mean I'll tell you what, if I could go back what I would do. If I knew coming into graduate school that I had a chronic illness, I wouldn't necessarily disclose it right away. Because again, you may not want anybody to discriminate against you for it. But at the same time once you've been admitted, and once you've accepted a program, that's something that I recommend being open about, especially with your health care providers, and getting the documentation that you need necessary to get accommodations. Why? Even if you disclose this to everybody, not everyone is going to be flexible or accommodating with you unless they see an actual signed form from a health provider saying that these are the types of accommodations you need. I don't believe in suffering in silence. I don't think that you should go to graduate school, not tell anybody, and then power through and make yourself sicker. That's what happened with me.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

So I definitely recommend- maybe you don't have to share at the beginning, maybe not when you're applying. I mean, up to you. That's something that you could, if you feel comfortable with, you could talk about that in your personal statement when you apply to graduate school. Because that's something that committee members sometimes take a look at. They look at how is the student different from everybody? How is the student going to contribute to diversity? And if you are living with a chronic illness and are differently abled, that's something that may not look bad on your part. But again, I know that's a very personal decision. I don't know that I would have felt comfortable going into graduate school sharing that, if I did have those issues back then. But I know definitely, once you've been admitted, you should advocate for yourself. That's the main thing that I can't stress enough is to learn to advocate for yourself, because no one else will. And your health comes first before anything else.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

All right, question number two. How do I bring my partner into my grad school search and plans when it mean relocating? That, again, is a very personal question. And I will, again, tell you what was going on with me at the time. So I got married. We basically got hitched in Vegas. We eloped and didn't tell anybody until two years later, by the time I started grad school. So I knew that I was gonna be with this person long term- obviously, we were married- when I applied to grad school.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

And I had a very honest conversation. I have always prioritized my career above anything else. That's kind of my own personality. So I was very clear with him about look, I'm applying to graduate programs. I hope that you'll be supportive. It might mean relocating. There's a really good chance that I'm gonna have to relocate. I mean, it's funny, because I didn't want to stay in LA. I was applying to a bunch of out of state schools, and the only PhD program I actually got admitted to was UCLA. So I did stay there. It worked out in a sense, but that wasn't my plan. My plan was to go to NYU, or go to Northwestern, or go to Brown, and then come back to LA, later after grad school. Thankfully, I have a partner and husband who has been very supportive of my career. He actually moved with me to Santa Barbara for this job that I have now, and has been able to then pursue his own studies after following me. So we moved here, and then he got his Master's. Now he got his job here somewhat. He commutes, but he still is able to make it work. So in relationships, a lot of it is give and take. It should be reciprocal. In some cases, he's going to be supporting you and maybe moving with you. In other cases, you're going to be doing that for him. Hopefully, this is your time, and this is a time that he can be supportive of you.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Okay, the last one- CV or resume? That's fairly straightforward. I would say that you should prioritize sending a CV if you're applying to graduate programs, especially if it's a Ph.D. program. If they said resume or CV, they mean CV. You send a CV, because it's a PhD program. You're expected to do research. That's the norm. If it's a master's program, I would say still send the CV unless it's an applied program. If it's an applied program, where you're getting a Master's in something, and you know you're gonna- or a professional program too. So by applied I mean, where they're helping you get a job right out of the Masters. You're not continue on in academia and continuing to do research. So if it's an applied program, you know you're gonna get an industry job, or some sort of job outside of academia. Go ahead and send the resume. If you're applying to a professional school, like law school, med school, MBAs, most likely the resume is a better fit for them than the CV.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I hope that helps, Morgan. Thanks so much for your patience. I know it's taken a little while for me to get back to you on these questions. But as always, I really appreciate you listening. Okay, now for my shout out. This week, my shout out is an Instagram account called The Latinx Blog. This is an Instagram account aiming to empower, educate and support the next generation of powerful and resilient Latinx individuals. The person running this account is named Zoe, and she's a blogger and Latinx mentor. One thing that I found really interesting-nice, and stood out to me- when I checked out the account is that she offers free 15 minute mentoring sessions in what she calls her "Mentor Me" program. I think that's just a great service that she's providing to the community. She reached out to me on Instagram and I learned more about it and was impressed. So that's why I am giving her a shout out. So please check out The Latinx Blog on Instagram. That's @TheLatinxBlog to learn more about the account. Okay, well that is all I have for today. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you enjoy your weekend, and I'll talk to you all next time.

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