131: Applying to Summer Research Programs with Hazel Carías-Urbina

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Welcome back everyone to the Grad School Femtoring podcast. This is Dra. Yvette and today we have an episode all about applying to summer research programs. And our special guest today is Hazel Carias-Urbina. She is a third year history student with a minor in Latin American Studies at Cal State LA, from Cal State University of Los Angeles. She is Mellon Mays Fellow, which is a research program dedicated to increasing diversity in the faculty ranks of institutions of higher learning. So we have that in common. She's also the daughter of Guatemalan and Honduran immigrants. And for her research, Hazel studies, the cultural influence of the Central American community and Pico Union la through the history of the Central American Independence Day Parade. Whoo, really interesting. Well, welcome to the podcast, Hazel.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Thank you so much, Dr. Yvette, it's awesome to be on.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I'm happy to have you. I would love for you to just get started by telling us a little bit more about yourself, your background, your backstory, and essentially everything that led you to pursuing what you're studying today.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Yeah, sure. So let's see, where do I start? Um, I was born here in LA, born and raised. Yeah, I have Guatemalan and Honduran parents. And they've lived here since around the early 90s. So we have some good roots here.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Let's see, I grew up in Pico Union, which is like the current area that I study. And I would say that, you know, that time in my life, you know, they really like shaped my childhood and just my current values about like, family and my identity and all that. Um, let's see, I was in the Los Angeles Public School System. LAUSD. And, you know, while I moved away from Pico Union at the age of 10, to South LA, I kind of followed the like, the opportunities to be an honors programs that were available in West Hollywood.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

So I went to like school John Burroughs Middle School. While living by USC, you can imagine like, hour trips. Yeah, I just got my driver's license. So looking back, I'm like, wow, my mom really made the sacrifice to take me there. And, you know, luckily, my dad was nearby in Koreatown. So I spent a lot of good time, like, all across LA. Imagine.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Yeah, in school, you know, I got an early interest for history. Although I was always kind of unsure. I felt like a, like a jack of all trades in a certain way. Um, and it was really until high school when I started to really think about what I would be interested in studying, because I always assumed that I'd go to university, but I didn't really know much about what I do there. You know, my brother was the first one to graduate in our family from university. And I would be only the second woman. So yeah, I mean, in high school, I started, it was a tumultuous time, I would say, for a student like me, I went to school, I started high school in 2015. And pretty much I saw the entirety of the administration's like doings throughout my entire time there. You can imagine for like a lot of students who are part of marginalized communities how that lived experience was. And, you know, that was kind of the time where my, I started thinking more about my identity as a Central American American, like just thinking about, you know, our particular communities like struggles and lived experiences here. And so, you know, I got to explore a little bit more that in Cal State LA, which I'm really lucky that Cal State LA has really given me the opportunity to explore more about the Latino communities' history here in LA.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

I started first learning a lot about like Chicanos and the Mexican American community. And I thought that was all awesome. And it gave me a foundation for, you know, learning more, but I was, you know, starting to get more interested in what, you know, about me, and about my background. And, you know, I kind of found like a little bit, it was a little hard, it was hard to find those kinds of opportunities to learn at first, but I kept digging, I found professors who were really into what I was interested in. And, you know, around that same time that I started developing this like, interest in the back of my head or on in sophomore year. I also started thinking about my career goals. And I had always been kind of like, I don't know teeter tottering like I knew I'd be okay in education and I have considered becoming a high school teacher, or a middle school teacher in history.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

You know, my, my older brother, who I mentioned before, he is a elementary school teacher, and through him, I got to know a bunch of other teachers and I became more familiar with that environment. But I started to question a bit more like, you know, once I started meeting all these awesome professors at Cal State LA, I think we have like, amazing, awesome teachers here you do? Yeah, we have so many great teachers, and they started really, you know, influencing me to think like, maybe I could do this, you know, and I didn't know anybody besides me professors, like, who was interested, interested in like, you know, that kind of career. So it was a bit scary. At first, it was a bit daunting.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

I started asking around, and one professor, her name is Dr. Daniela Suarez, who is currently my thesis advisor for Mellon. She recommended me to apply to the program, because she saw that I both had a research interest and that I was interested in becoming a professor. And yeah, you know, I applied and it you know, I got in very luckily. And it's been an amazing experience. So far. Now, I'm just fully into it, you know, fully into getting into my research project, getting it done, and learning a lot of stuff along the way as I approach applying to grad school and like the next year, so, yeah, that's me.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

That's great. And that leads us it's a perfect segue into talking about one of the milestones or recommended experiences, that's part of I know, Mellon and other grad school preparation programs, which is applying and hopefully getting in and having some sort of summer research experience. And so I would love to hear your take on that your experience with navigating applying to summer research programs. And you know, what has come up for you?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Sure, so, yeah, I mean, currently, I'm in the process of applying to summer research programs. And so far, it's been all right, although, you know, because of the unique situation I'm in where, you know, I started Mellon online, you know, I didn't get to do much of the opportunities that people get to do in person, like the consortiums, you know, meeting other fellows, and, you know, like it, you know, all those things that you get to do in person? Um, yeah, it's been kind of a weird, nebulous experience. Um, let's see, yeah, I've had to prepare. Oh, sorry.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Oh, no, that's okay. No, I was just thinking about, you know, your experience in particular, as someone who was a history major, so you're in the humanities. And my experience as a English major being in the humanities, when I was applying to summer programs was that there were so few of them. When I would look them up, it felt like everything was tailored and catered to the STEM programs. And there were few humanities and social studies programs. And even if there were, there was more, again, like the emphasis on the social sciences, rather than the humanities. And so I can imagine with the pandemic, with doing everything virtually, with being a humanities student, it must be challenging to be applying summer programs in my right.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

You're absolutely right. Yeah, you brought up a good point about, you know, if I didn't have Mellon, I think it would be pretty hard to find those humanities research programs for the summer. Which can be crucial to like understanding how you do research and like preparing for like, you know, if you want to go to grad school, like it's, it's tough. Yeah, you know, some, especially with like, pandemic things, I've kind of been on organized for summer programs being advertised to students, for example, like, USC has a jumpstart program for the summer. And it's largely STEM based. And there's really only one history of projects available for history students to get onto. I applied to because I am interested in USC for, you know, eventually to apply to like, grad school. But yeah, it's kind of just the kind of, like, send you an email out of nowhere, the deadline is in two weeks, and you're like, oh, shoot, you know, I need to scramble, and I need to get my stuff together. Um, what else?

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

In terms of, oh, sorry. It's okay. No, I was just wanted to follow up on that, because you said that, thanks to the support of Mellon, you've been able to find some programs to apply to. And so what has that process been like in terms of finding programs? Has it been mostly through word of mouth and emails that you received? or have there been other places because I know I usually recommend students to check out some of like the big summer program. I don't know if I don't know what you call them, like the websites like the the Big 10, the Leadership Alliance, the National Science Foundation, Research Experience for Undergraduate (REU) programs. But those are the big ones. And other than that, there's so much more. There's so many programs that we're not even aware of, because like you said, sometimes the information is nebulous. It's not clear. And it's hard to find out who was accepting students who isn't this year.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Yeah, yeah, no, for sure. I mean, I basically got my master list of research programs from Dr. Wilde, who's my program coordinator for Mellon. And he yeah, he provided the list. I picked out the schools that I was interested in now and interested in for the future. Yeah, you know, then they came from, like, popular institutions like the University of Chicago, UCLA. Yeah. What else is gonna say I did apply to Leadership Alliance, because I heard that was a pretty popular one. But other than that, most of the most of the ways I've learned about the programs are through him, and also through just random emails, like I like the one I got to see. Yeah.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yeah, that was my experience. Also, on the other end of things that just as a Mellon Fellow myself, but then being someone directing a program and getting emails from multiple different directors of other programs, saying forward this to your students, you have this summer program, so I can imagine you're probably getting receiving some of those emails from the folks over at Mellon. Yeah. So what are your hopes? What is it that you hope to gain out of your summer research? Well, first the application process, and then hopefully getting in and having this experience?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Well, let's see what I hope to really gain from that summer experience is having the time to really dedicate to my research budget, um, you know, with the fall semester, in the spring semester, you obviously have your classes to take care of, then you have responsibilities outside of that, like at work are happening. And then you have to continue your research budget. And I think I've been doing an okay job of trying to balance everything all at once. But, you know, sometimes I really do wish that I had that, you know, a lot of time, because I do care about my project, and I want to, you know, really advance it, I want it to to look good for my future presentations. And you know, that, I hope that that will be the case for the summer, like I'll have that space that support to from like people who know about my topic, and are willing to help me with it. Yeah, you know, that's, that's kind of what I hope to get just some a lot of time.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

And just out of curiosity, because I myself have not been checking our Is there a mix in terms of whether they're virtual or in person, or most programs going back to in person? Like, what have you found from the programs that you have looked into?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

That's a really good question. So when I first joined Mellon, because it was online, I kind of assumed that the summer research, you know, program time would be, like, all online, just because I started online, even and online. But now things are kind of, you know, like, rapidly approaching, you know, the mask mandate in LA just recently dropped on Friday. And so things are kind of starting to go back in person. And, you know, like, yeah, most of the programs that I've applied to, I believe will be in person that I haven't received any notifications that they will be online. It's a little scary to think about just because this, you know, I applied to institutions outside of my state. And, you know, that would mean I would have to go live in the state where the institution is, and that's, you know, my first that would be my first time going anywhere on my own ever. So yeah, it's it's, it's exciting, I guess now, but I really had to process that. When I didn't, the summer I got into Mellon. Yeah, so I think they're going to be in person.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I'm crossing my fingers for you in the hopes that you do get into one out of state because it's such a great experience. I know you said you you want to gain that ability to have time like to dedicate fully to your research. But then there's so much more that you gain from summer programs from the connections are the people that you meet to getting to know another campus and almost like a preview, like what my grad school look like and then if you actually go in person at a stays having that confidence to say like I can be on my own. It's that adulting side of summer program that makes you realize, oh, okay, like, I can stand on my own two feet. Because for a lot of us who are first gen or maybe child of immigrants, we might be the first the worst person move out of the home. The first to go you know, I remember the first time I told my mom was going to go out of the country for an internship. She prayed and she thought I was gonna get killed. Oh my god. Call me every night. And I did. So like, don't be surprised if your family members are asking you to call them all the time.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

No, I know, like, you know, I just recently listened to your episode about explaining grad school to your parents. And, you know, that made me think like, Oh, I really got to stop and start prepping them now, because this is something that I am considering for my future. And I already told them about the Leadership Alliance, which a lot of those institutions are offered on the East Coast. And so that would potentially mean I would have to go away, you know, all that way, you know, for the summer. And my parents, when I first told them, they were like, What do you mean, you're going to these schools.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

What do you mean? You're not going. You're not going, is there's not one here in LA?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Yeah, I tried to reassure them by saying that I applied to Stanford, which is in California right. But I, you know, I wanted to apply to Yale, and also Chicago, which I know isn't really on the east coast, but it's

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

over that way, Midwest, but closer to that side than this side.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

So, you know, just, they were first very hesitant to accept it. But eventually, they were like, you know, what it's for, it's for school. And, you know, this will just, it'll just be temporary. And I keep trying to bring it up to them, like, kind of often, like, just really just some updates about my application process to not just leadership lines, but like, you know, other schools, you know, that I'm looking at. So, yeah, I don't know. It's exciting, though, I do want to take this opportunity to go somewhere. I don't know if I'll be able to do that ever again. My case? Yeah.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

You know, I'm sure that because of the mentorship that you've been receiving, that maybe someone has told you this, but I just want to remind you, and if some no one's told you this, then I'm just telling you, right here so that you and everybody else can hear. But if you get into a summer program, you should give yourself a huge pat on the back. Because I believe and this is my belief based on 11 plus years of assisting students with getting into grad school, I believe, based on what I've observed my observations that it's harder to get into a summer program than it is to get into grad school. Why? Because there are fewer professors available in the summer to take on students and work with them. And there are also fewer summer research programs than there are graduate programs available. And so and then it even it's further compounded if you are in the humanities, because there are even fewer humanities available for you to play. So they suddenly become hyper competitive. And on top of that, you might have a perfect application. There's just no one there to work with you that summer.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I just want to remind you this so that hopefully, fingers crossed, you get in somewhere. And you can have that validation of like I got in somewhere, which means that I am good enough and I can get into graduate school. So just letting you you know, okay.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Okay, now for sure.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

If, for some reason, it doesn't work out. I, you know, just be like, Okay, I'm getting redirected, I'm moving on to something else. I have other opportunities, because just reminders, or there's so much that goes on behind the scenes that you don't see, that may have nothing to do with how amazing you are in your application. So just, that's a really...

Hazel Carías-Urbina

...no, it's a really good reminder. And you know what, just to bring up one last thing about it is, you know, for Mellon students, this is a requirement right to do some research program, something that kind of facilitates that is the, the certain Mellon programs, summer research programs that are available to students. So I'm applying to UCLA. And that one is hosted by Mellon. So it is a little easier for us to do it. And that's a privilege that you get as a fellow. So I can imagine for other students, it's gonna be a little harder. But yeah, for it, and also just the topic that I'm doing, you know, I've really had a tough time looking for schools with faculty that studied Central America. And ...

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

...because where are the Central American studies departments?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Exactly.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I'm like, it's Chicanx studies, and maybe they might add, and, but I can imagine your frustration. It's like, you keep feeling like there's less and less, you know, opportunities for you because of your discipline, because of your topic, because of your interests. And it just hopefully reminds you like, this is why you're doing what you're doing. Because folks like you and your work are needed. Yeah.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

That's always good reminder. Yeah, I applied to Yale and I applied really because there were a lot of grad students dedicated to that work. Some of them were from Cal State LA, which is really nice, nice. It is nice to know, in some corners of the country, you know, there are some of us there, we're doing the work. You know...

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I wanted to hear a little bit more about your experience with the Mellon Mays Program because well, one, it's a graduate school preparation program, a lot of folks that are, you know, first gen and going to grad school, they have gone that route, thanks in part to the supportive grad prep programs like melon McNair. There's a bunch of other ones too. And so what has that been like for you, because I'm sure a lot may have changed since I went to undergrad and participate in this program. And I know that for me, it was really formative. And to this day, I have connections that are meaningful, because of the the folks that I met, you know, in that in that experience. So what's what's it been like for you thus far in the Mellon program?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Well, I'm just first things first, as I think my experience in Mellon has just been fantastic. It's been really, really great. I never really thought that I could have so many people in my corner when it comes to my studies. And just even now I'm smiling about it, because it's just, it's been really good. I will say that my experience is kind of unique again, because you know, online learning has really affected all parts of academia, all parts of being in school. You know, I initially joined, let's see, I joined because I wanted to find other students who were interested in what I was doing as well, like, in college, it's kind of a lonely thing. Sometimes, if you don't branch out, and especially added with, you know, being at home, in quarantine, while doing your studies, it's practically impossible to keep up with people to become friends and become you know, of your peers. And so, when I applied to this program, the benefits of like, you know, somebody supporting my research and my studies, that was great. But the fact that I would be three other people who would understand like that process of like, during the project of going to the consortiums, it, it sounded really nice. And I'm happy to report that like, yes, it's been great. You know, we still have our limitations. Of course, like being online, a lot of things are now hybrid. But I, you know, I have, like, everybody in my cohort is in a different field. And yet, we still find ways to support each other, we find, we find a certain source that we think is is relevant to someone's project we'll send it will keep up with each other. We all have a text, chat, and like, we keep up pretty regularly. So it's nice. Yeah. I know, I kind of veered off.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

That's okay. No, I is I'm just reminded, I know that we've talked a little bit before the recording of how, you know, don't be surprised if these people end up becoming lifelong friends. Yeah, beyond whatever it is that you decide to do. In grad school and outside of grad school. It's enough for me, it wasn't just the mentorship that was critical. It was the cohort, it was the people that I met, and the community that I built. And that kind of brings me to wanting to ask you about community building, precisely because you're talking to me about your experience being Central American American, about your parents and the sacrifices they made to come here about what has been like to study to study, you said the Central American community in LA so your community. So tell us what has that been like to try to form community find community at Cal State LA and just in LA more broadly?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

I will say, I mean, it's been kind of slow, you know, you find the people just, you know, through classes sometimes. And you have good conversations with them about, you know, that particular topic. Yeah, I don't know. It was it was pretty tough at first without Mellon. And then once I started dedicating myself to finding like LAS classes, or like Latin American Studies classes, it became a lot easier. So this semester, I've met a bunch of people who are interested, I even have a interest Central America class. That has been just awesome. And I've met not only undergrad students, but like, you know, students and masters and grad programs that are like, focusing on different aspects of the community here. So yeah, I mean, it's been it's, it's kind of interesting, like you kind of see this. Yeah, I'm trying to add Sorry, I lost my idea there. I will say it's been nice that I'll leave it there. It's it's a lot easier now. I've really delved into my, like, research with my studies like with my classes, I'm starting to, like integrate both to. Yeah, so sorry.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

It's okay.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Um, yeah, so we're just talking about building community as a Central American student, and I know you said it's been good. But I think there's also that other side of of of it that it is challenging, especially in SoCal, when there's such a predominant Mexican American community and Mexican immigrant community. I remember. I mean, like, it's funny, we're just, I was just telling you, oh, some of the people might become your closest friends. One of my closest friends, I met through the Mellon Mays Program, and she herself is Central American. She is Salvadorian American. And it's that that frustration of like, studying Chicanx Studies and not seeing yourself represented among the faculty, even though the faculty are all POC, and, and then that the assumption that people make that you are of a particular background, or have a particular identity, when that's not always necessarily true. So, you know, I want to remind you that it's okay to say that, like, it can also be challenging, and hopefully it gets easier over time. And sometimes, you build community with folks of the same background as us, and sometimes you build community with folks have, like, similar but not exactly the same background as you too. Yeah.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

You know, I am glad you kind of mentioned it, because, but yeah, there's the challenging aspect. And I, I don't often bring it up, because, you know, I started my studies with, you know, the Latino community in LA, at Cal State LA, by learning Chicano history. And that in itself was so empowering, because you see, people in photos, and there you read their stories, people who look like your family who are, you know, have like similar immigrant backgrounds, being part of the, you know, diaspora as well, you get empowered by seeing that, but eventually, you know, I kind of like, thought, Well, I'm not gonna, you know, my parents are not from Mexico. And, you know, I have, you know, I grew up in LA, where I've met a lot of people like that, but I'm just, I'm not, we, as a community have different experiences, you know, we have like, especially in relationships to with the United States, like, you know, we, in recent, like, the recent generation of immigrants, you know, in the 80s, and 90s, like, dealt with, you know, person, you know, fleeing persecution, violence, poverty. And so, you know, we have that, like, really unique part of our community that doesn't get studied very often isn't given much attention. And the first time I really saw it get attention was by the vitriol of, you know, our recent president. So that kind of brought it to light where it's like, I really got to give, I really got to pay more attention to like, why is it that I'm here? And why? Why haven't why was it so hard to figure out? Why I am here, you know, what I mean? I don't know if that makes sense. But, yeah, yeah.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I think that for a lot of us, sometimes that's what brings us to the research is to learn more about ourselves and about our families, about our ancestors. And that in in and of itself is so empowering. And, you know, even though I, I like to be open about when when I advise students about making sure that to keep their options open, open in terms of their career paths, because the future of academia there's there's just not a lot of tenure track jobs, and everybody's gonna get a covered a tenure track job. Despite that, I do believe in the power of research, and I do believe in the power of gaining that sense of consciousness, you know, the paradigms that are shifted the you just learned something learning so much about yourself and your backstory and the history that completely transforms your life and in and the lives of everybody that comes after you. So yeah, I hope that you continue to build strong communities, you know, within Cal State LA and beyond, because who knows where you end up for summer programs and where you'll end up for grad school. I wanted to ask you if you have any closing thoughts on anything related to summer programs, Mellon, building community, or just your experience as an undergrad navigating research with this penned pandemic that I'm like, I don't think it's over. The people are trying to act like it is, though...

Hazel Carías-Urbina

..for sure. Now I do see a little bit of a panic, but I think we'll see any closing thoughts. I think, you know, it's been great being a part of Mellon I growing up, I never thought that I would be on the track, but I am and it fits so well now with the person that I'm becoming, which feels really good. What else? Yeah, I could not, I feel like I really dedicate, you know, my research to just my, to my family, to my parents, their lived experiences. And I'm really grateful for the research that does exist, you know, I kind of want to bring up something that a professor of mine last semester brought up to me, which is, um, I'm part of, like, a new generation of researchers from the Central American community that's starting to do research on on us, right. And, you know, I have to think like other researchers who have done the work before me, like, I can think of like, Leisy Abrego, and you know, money stuck out in us who, you know, those immediately come to mind, like, they come to mind when I think of like, what encourages me to keep going with my projects. So, I'm with summer programs, I think, you know, I'm just hoping for the best in terms of like, I think it'll be a really good, like opportunity for me to become a little more independent. You know, both like structuring my research project and making sure I got it together. And also, as a person, you know, you need to get out there, especially for someone like me, I feel like, you know, I have lived in a way my entire life, I don't get out much.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I can empathize, you know, as, you know, a fellow Latina from SoCal. And now, I moved my family to Portugal. Like, what Yes. You never know what might be in store for you and your future.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Yeah, no, I'm excited. Yeah. Yeah.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

All right. Well, okay. Last question. Before we go is if folks resonated with what you said, and want to be in touch, want to connect in some way, shape or form? How can they reach you? Are you on social? Or is there any contact info you'd like to share?

Hazel Carías-Urbina

Yeah, best way to reach out to me is through my Cal State LA email. I don't really have many socials and stuff. So my email is hcarias@calstatela.edu. It should be Carias the same way. Yeah,

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

I can add it to the show notes. Perfect. Well, it's been so nice to chat with you, Hazel. It's just been nice to hear from your perspective and how things are going and and just to know that you know, the I want to say la lucha continua. You know, like we just, we keep going and you know, summer programs keep going, grad school prep programs keep going or research keep going. We keep going. So it's just, it's, it's nice to hear your perspective and to have you come on and share your wisdom with us. So thank you so much.

Hazel Carías-Urbina

No, I really appreciate it. I'm really happy to be on. This is really exciting. So yeah, I hope that just people benefit from what I've said at least you could find, you know, some solace in knowing that there's someone out there and maybe going through the same thing. Same thoughts. Yeah, just know you got this. If you're listening to this.

Dra. Yvette Martínez-Vu

Yeah, you're not alone. Thank you.