127: Adulting and Life After College as a First-Gen Professional with Marisol Ibarra

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Welcome back everyone to the Grad School Femtoring podcast. This is Doctora Yvette and today I have an episode for you all about adulting and life after college as a first gen professional.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

And we have a special guest today her name is Marisol Ibarra she is the founder of Here Comes the Sun podcast where she helps first gen students and college graduates and young professionals navigate things that schools don't teach. So things like adulting, which is why we have her on today. She's also the proud daughter of immigrants. And by day, she's a legislative director associate helps to draft policy for communities of color in the state of California. Outside the mic, though, Marisol enjoys traveling, she loves spending time with her family and drinking coffee, we have that in common I like all of those things. Welcome to the podcast Marisol!

Marisol Ibarra

Thank you, thank you, Doctora Yvette for for inviting me and being able to share a little bit about my story.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

I'm excited to hear more, I would love for you to start us off with telling us about your backstory. So tell us like what led you to becoming who you are and to, you know, taking on your current educational and career path?

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, absolutely. And I think, you know, we all come from different backgrounds, but I think when we're able to share our story or share where we come from, I think that's when people can relate. And people are like, you know, it's not, you know, impossible and whatever work that we do. So I guess I'll start with, you know, I am a proud daughter of Mexican immigrants, you know, my parents migrated from Mexico, in the 80s. So, you know, they really wanted to accomplish their American dream. So for them was being able to buy a home and send their, their children to college, because those were opportunities that they never got.

Marisol Ibarra

So with that in mind, you know, always, you know, school was always a priority for my parents, you know, they they worked, like I, you know, work, you know, the night shift, and my mom, you know, sometimes would work the night shift, but you know, they were trying to balance, you know, daycare, so that really, you know, instilled in me, you know, hard work, always working really, really hard, and I think, always been really grateful for each for each opportunity. When I was in, you know, growing up, I was very involved in school, because I felt that my involvement in school didn't make me feel that I had to go home, and sometimes worry about the problems that were happening in the home, you know, the problems around, you know, poverty, the problems around, you know, access to food, or just things that would come up in life.

Marisol Ibarra

So I think I was very involved in school, I took on a lot of leadership roles. Growing up, you know, I was part of like, you know, my, my student body, Associated Student Body, and I was like, the President, I was just, like, always involved, and always spending time, you know, in school and just trying to find, I think, resources in a very young age, I think, I learned how to advocate and it was such a skill that has helped me, you know, through all of life, just because of the resources that were not given to us, you know, at a very young age, but also, like, the schools that we came from, didn't have opportunities. So I was always, you know, looking for opportunities, looking for, you know, internships and really putting myself out there, because I knew that was a way that that I knew that I was going to be successful and be able to not just lift myself up or my family, but you know, my my whole community as a whole. So that's a little bit of background, I think, my upbringing.

Marisol Ibarra

But I did get a full scholarship to go to Cal Poly Pomona. So that's where I got my undergraduate degree. And my time on top poly was was amazing. I did get an opportunity to study abroad, I went to Dubai and Hong Kong, to study abroad, which was an amazing experience in itself. I got to teach different curriculum at different state prisons. You know, so that was really amazing work and really work that really grounded me. But I also, you know, to pivot and to really learn about where did I want to go after I graduated college, through through life.

Marisol Ibarra

I thought I wanted to become an attorney that I wanted to, you know, help defend folks but you know, when you're in those positions, or you're doing those types of internships, you realize that maybe that work is not you know, as as impactful as you think that you would want to be. So, you know, just really putting myself out there. I did an internship with the with the judge, I got to study abroad, but I also a requirement in Cal Poly Pomona, with you know, getting your Bachelor's in political science is that you had to do a senior thesis, but I did a whole year of research.

Marisol Ibarra

Prior to me graduating, you know, I was able to present at the Political Science Association, you know, to present my work and I really think you know, all that skill It has helped me today in the position that I am today I'm I'm currently a legislative director, working in California state legislature just working on policy. So all that skill set that I learned through life and through college has really, you know, shaped the way I think and the way I really, you know, advocate on behalf of Californians when it comes to state policy. That's it in a nutshell.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

I love it. It's very, very succinct. I'm like, Oh, you got straight to where you're at now, which is perfect. And it gets me to the next question, which is, so you're here to talk about adulting. And you're here to talk about life after college. And I can imagine, most have been really, for a lot of us, it's difficult to figure out what you want to do in life. And so I'm wondering, how or what was your, your first year out of undergrad? What was that experience? Like? Like, how did you navigate that transition?

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, absolutely. And to be honest, I think I'll go a little bit a prior year, as before graduating, I think, you know, people ask you like, what are you going to do after college? That that question that you're like, I don't know, like, I'm trying to finish, you know, my classes to get to that level. You're not thinking as much ahead, but then when people start questioning you, you know, this, like, fear of like, I don't know what I'm going to do, I don't have anything lined up, you know. And I think, you know, that really did come to mind.

Marisol Ibarra

So I did get the opportunity. My last year when I was doing my research for my thesis, to come up to Sacramento, to do an internship and all, like, I guess, like really trying to prepare you for the workforce. So I was working in the California Legislature, like as an intern, but my hours were nine to five. So I think that was kind of the first real experience, but I was still like, you know, I was still a student. So they would still give me you know, like treat me like a student, but also like a working professional, like a, like a preschool, I guess for, for for the workforce.

Marisol Ibarra

So I think that really allowed me to also like, there was days where I was, like, I'm gonna take a day off. Or I'm gonna, you know, I have to focus on my research, and then they will be really cool about it. So I think that gave me the pre-steps before me, you know, really being my first year out in the workforce. So that was really good. I think I really, it allowed me to, like, you know, I kind of liked this work, but so yeah, so that was kind of the beginning portion of it.

Marisol Ibarra

But then I did graduate, you know, time came up, you know. I did have the opportunity that, you know, there was an opening, you know, within my office, so that I can, you know, move on from an intern to a paid employee to what's called a legislative aide. So, to be honest, in the beginning, I was like, you know, what, like, Let me think about it, like I was, I wasn't sure, because I was like, it's far away from home. I, you know, my school was in Pomona in Southern California, and I had moved 300 miles, which is not that much. But you know, being a first generation first time moving out of home is hard, you know, that transition itself.

Marisol Ibarra

So I remember, you know, having to my dad had to bring me up, you know, he had to bring me up to Sacramento. And it was very emotional for him, you know, just leaving their daughter even though I was already like, almost, what, 22 years old, but it was the first time then having to do it. And even to this day, I like a couple of weeks ago was my birthday. And my dad was you know, talking about that experience with his with the family. And he just says like, it wasn't great experience like Sacramento, I'm happy that you're there and that you're there. You're thriving, and you're that you're succeeding. But Sacramento doesn't have a really nice place in my heart, you know, right now, because of the moment I had to leave you. And I had to leave a part of me there.

Marisol Ibarra

So it, I guess, from him sharing that perspective really, really made me think it was like, wow, it was really hard for them to leave. And I think oftentimes we don't, we don't hear our parents be very emotional, or, you know, show that type of love. But I know that they're that they're always there to support us and to support our dreams, even though in the beginning, it's really hard.

Marisol Ibarra

So yeah, so I think coming back to our my first year in the workforce, I'll be honest, I was so tired, like night, the night binges, the fact that I was nine to five, I would get home. I was like, You know what, I'm gonna have to take a nap because I'm so tired. Like, like, just it was just so hard for me to to just like navigate, you know, working the nine to five. But then you know, little by little I started to, to really come to the realization that you know, that this was it like this was the this was, you know, the workforce. This was what it means to be a young professional, you know, and it hit me hit me really, really hard.

Marisol Ibarra

The fact that that was it and that and it was the grind, I think have come coming to the realization that this was, you know, I had to do the small task, I had to, you know, go make print documents, you know, I wasn't doing the glamorous work of, you know, really, you know, working in policy, like I like ambition or, you know, or working on on policy, but I think within the time, it came, you know, with the trust of the team trusting me, you know, I was okay, I would communicate with my mentors, and my and my managers.

Marisol Ibarra

Hey, I'm really interested in working on policy, like I can manage, you know, what we have to do in the office, but I also want to be part of the conversations on how you navigate, you know, negotiations, when it comes to policy, or how you kind of your, your thoughts when it comes to, you know, writing certain policies, I really was very intention on asking my, my manager, if I can, you know, tag along, and I think, tagging along really showed me how things are done. And it really showed me the hands on approach of, of how to do the work.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

That's great. You know, I'm really glad that you talk about this experience, and you share the struggles in navigating a nine to five immediately after graduating, because I think I hear from a lot of students who are so burnt out from school, and then they think that a nine to five will be a break. So so they're just like, Oh, I just need time off, I just need to get a full time job, I just need to see like something else, you know that some something different than what they've had, which is schooling most of their life.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

And on the other side of things, because I am someone who has gone to grad school and also had a nine to five, it's, it's hard either way, it is really hard. And I also think we need to demystify this idea that you have to land a perfect dream job right after graduating. I don't think that's true. For most people, it might be for some, but for most of us, I like to tell people think about like your first job as your stepping stone. And so that you need that stepping stone job, that stepping stone job might require you to be, I don't know, stapling paperwork for someone making copies, getting coffee, whatever it is like, or just learning the basics or shadowing someone like like you did, you know, where you're asking, can I step in? Can I watch? Can I observe.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

My first job after graduating grad school was assisting someone in a scholarship center, and she managed over a million dollars worth of scholarships. And so I asked, can I help you with this process. And so I got to see the behind the scenes process of like, interview selection and how you, like, oversee different funds and who it goes to and like the relations with donors. And that was huge for me, because then it opened me up to all these other opportunities afterwards. So I just feel like, there are a couple of things that you said there that are going to be especially helpful to my listeners about one. It's hard either way that first year out of it's hard work if you don't have a job, because then you're struggling to pay bills and figuring out what am I going to do with my life. It's hard if you have a job because the nine to five is no joke. It's every single day nine to five, sometimes longer. And it leaves you very little time, especially if you're commuting very little time to yourself.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

It's hard if you go back to school because you haven't had that mental break. And so it's just about like being compassionate with yourself and whatever stage you're at that first year after graduating. Now, I would love to hear more from you about the topic of adulting and just some of the things that you wish that you had learned or someone would have taught you or shared with you or like what were the parts of life after college that were especially difficult and I know because you yourself have a similar background child of immigrants first gen, etcetera.

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, absolutely. I think going back to glamorizing you know your first job out of college and I think social media has played a big factor. We see people doing this like very glamorous job, but it's like, it's not always like that, you know?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

It looks even what we do, because you're a fellow podcaster too. And I'm like ya'll see us putting out podcasts regularly. You don't see all the hustle.

Marisol Ibarra

You don't see the editing. They don't see that the hard part where you're like, hold on, let me go back, lemme really hear this. Lemme, like, you have to go back. Yeah. So yeah, absolutely. And I think it's okay. I think the point is, just get your foot in the door. Sometimes just getting that foot in the door, allows you to see what you're actually going to like, because sometimes we think, you know, our parents, you know, have said, you know, go to school, and then you know, you'll you'll find a job that you're really passionate about, or like, you know, my parents were like I used can be, you know, naviga, an engineer or a doctor. Those were like the only options because that's all they kind of knew and that's all they knew that was a high paying job. for them, but it's like no, like, I think you have to it has to come back to you.

Marisol Ibarra

And it has to come back to like, what are you truly passionate? Why are you, why do you want to become a lawyer? Is it because your parents have ingrained in you that you know that you are you so much or that you that you always are, like, you know, willing to argue? Or is it because, you know, that's truly what you want to I think, you know, once you want, if you're in college, ask yourself those questions. But if you already graduated with the degree, still, you're able to ask yourself questions. And I think that you know, that we're gonna have multiple jobs, we're gonna have multiple roles, and you have the ability to change your mind that just because I got a degree in political science doesn't mean that I can go into the business sector, there's going to be very transferable skills that you learn that are going to help you like, for example, negotiating, I learned negotiating to the political science view prac.

Marisol Ibarra

But now, like, I get to negotiate, you know, negotiate my pay, which is another thing about authority, but I get to negotiate, you know, different things on policy on the policy sector, that I was like, wow, that that skill set really helped me. So I think it really comes back to you. And really, what do you want to do? Like, you know, if it means that you're interested, maybe in the creative side of something like maybe try to go into that sector, and maybe you are going to be an assistant. I when I started, I was an assistant, you're not going to become an you're not going to come into the workforce and be a manager right away, like, No, you have to really come come to, to whatever industry you're in, and really come with an open mind and say, Hey, like, what does your night? What does your day look like? What are you constantly? What are your challenges?

Marisol Ibarra

Like, ask your managers, when you ask yourself these, these these questions, because then you're like, hey, like, I really want to do that, right? Like, no, I don't, I want to, I really want to do something else. So I think I really want to emphasize that, like, come with an open mind. And I think when you come with an open mind, opportunities will open and opportunities will come and when you're passionate people notice the passion and and many doors will open in the process. So I want to first you know, emphasize that, but I think now coming back to adulting. Like I said, it was so hard to come to the realization that I was like, This is it. This is my nine to five, I worked I don't know how many years my parents, you know, really said, you know, once you graduate college, you know, you're gonna have a career and you're gonna have a well paying job. And I was like, this is not it, you know, like, I it's not, I'm not making, you know, the money that I thought I was gonna make.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Okay, can we talk about that a little, just a little bit more, because I had that experience, too. Sorry, I just got so excited. But I think that for me as a student, not having had a full time job and not having been taught about things like taxes, and benefits. When I assume someone made a certain salary I thought they had it made, I thought they were living it up. And then when I finally achieved a certain salary level, let's say it's like, 60,000. I thought, oh my gosh, if I make 60,000 I'm good, I'm gonna be fine. Like, and then when I was like, okay, now take out way to take away 1/3 of that paycheck to benefits and taxes. Okay, now you're living off of 40,000. And now take away like, half of that for for rent? Or do you have 20,000 And I'll take away half of that for childcare. And I'll say, you know, it just gets smaller and smaller. And then I was still like, barely making ends meet.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Or, or just like in the negative, that first year, I remember being in the negative because I was living above, above my means and not because I was spending frivolously it was because my cost of living was so high. And I realized that the hard wayand realize that in like in doing it, I didn't realize it, you know, when I accepted the job and didn't negotiate, you know, so those are things that like you said, negotiating your pay, negotiating your first job, your first salary, not something you're taught, but it is okay to do that. You know, and many people know it's an expectation but you're not taught you're taught to be like grateful for whatever you get, especially there's like gendered and cultural factors behind that.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

So yeah, there's there's that and I'm sorry, I were, like I was, I completely interrupted you, I just wanted to go back to this idea of you think that you have it made and then you reach this point where you're like, I have this job that's a good job, or sometimes it might even be the dream job. And you said it right there. This is it. Like wait, what, this is my life?

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, yeah. And once you get that realization, you're like, oh, yeah, I think you start to like, question everything and I think questioning that is always good because then you really have you asked that those questions and were like, I might the work that I'm doing really happy like me, too. selling myself, my, my, you know, my nine to five those days hours? Are they worth it? You know, are they good? And I think it comes back to that question. But I think let's get let's talk about a little bit about money money once you once you graduate. And I think negotiating a salary is so important, even though you are starting as an assistant, get in the habit of negotiating your salary. And I know that it's going to be uncomfortable, it's going to be hard the first time but if the moment you do it for the first time, it's going to become easier when you get to next role. So it's about doing it the first time and being intimidated and being nervous. But know your numbers, like do your research beforehand, before you know, sitting down in the interviewer knowing that they're gonna want to negotiate with you always ask for more.

Marisol Ibarra

And I think something that I really want to hear, like, if they can give you maybe a higher salary, negotiate how many days off you want, there's different points of negotiation, when it comes to, to come to your first role, like maybe ask them like, hey, like, you know, I'm, I'm happy to for this opportunity, maybe you can give me a higher salary, but I really want to know that I'm right is I'm gonna leave an extra hour early because I'm prepping for, you know, my GRE or I'm prepping for something else, or like, you know, I'm taking an additional course, because I really want to, you know, be the best that I can be in my role.

Marisol Ibarra

And I think there's different ways that you can negotiate, and it doesn't always have to be salary, maybe it's something that's like, hey, you know, like, I'm really interested in my personal development, what can the company do to cover maybe some of these trainings, or cover, you know, some of some courses, like, I really want to be on top of the game. And I think when you're very proactive and being very upfront, in the beginning, it shows that it shows, you know, the company that that you are very, you know, proactive. So that's kind of my first caveat that I always tell, you know, first gen professionals negotiate, negotiate, negotiate.

Marisol Ibarra

And I think, once you get really comfortable with the skill set is going to come very natural, and it's not going to be it's not gonna feel intimidating. So that's like my first, you know, caveat, but I think, now that we that you are making a salary, let's say that you are, you know, in a row, and you are making $60,000, like, you might think this is a lot of money, because maybe like myself, like growing up in poverty, this was, like you said, they take away money for your 401K, they take away money for your health insurance benefits, is, you know, your company provides, they take money, you know, for taxes for the Social Security. And these are, these are things that maybe you didn't, we're not as aware. So, what I always recommend, you know, first-gen professionals, when, when getting their first paycheck, see how much money is coming in? Yeah, and also evaluate how much money is going out? Like, for example, you know, your housing, that's, that's a line item, and I'm going kind of into the details of of creating a budget. Yes.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

I just released an episode on budgeting too.

Marisol Ibarra

So yeah, yeah, absolutely. I think budgeting is not a way I think I always really come back to the, to the, to the emphasis of like, no budget is not limiting yourself, you just really been very intention of where your money is going. Because once we're aware, and what we'll see the numbers you're like, really, like, you know, 30% or 15% of it is going on, you know, on something that is not really bringing you joy, like maybe you should be very intentional, ask yourself, like, maybe I can cut this area, because I want to create, you know, I want to have money, enough money to have a travel fund, or I want to be able to buy my home, you know, in the next couple years, or whatever goals you have, creating, you know, these, these, these, these funds, what are called, you know, safe, yeah, pretty much funds within your budget to make sure that you that you that you pay those out. And then you know, in the future, you can, you can use those resources.

Marisol Ibarra

So, you know, we review your finances, I know in the beginning, it can be intimidating, it can be hard, seeing how much money is coming in. But it's not until you really sit with those numbers, and you really are really intentional about you know, each allocation for each, then that's when you actually can set goals and be very intentional and feel that your finances are in order, because that's a part of adulthood that really is hard. Like maybe our parents didn't they would manage our money or they would manage you know the household but then there's responsibility comes to you back to you. So it's been very mindful and very intentional.

Marisol Ibarra

So what I like to do is that I sent myself two dates, each month of like, reviewing my finances so like on the 15th When I get paid, and then the last of the month and it's like, I shoot myself to a little coffee where I'll make little like a little you know, all time turn on a little I light a candle and then I'm like, you know, I'm just gonna focus you know, this hour and I'm like just an hour and I set a timer. In this hour. I'm just gonna focus on where money is going, you know, our bills being paid. You know, automation is a game changer for first time professionals. You know, just automate your payments if it means, you know, if you have a credit card, you know, automate, you know, abuse and the dollars every month making sure that it's automation. So I really am, I create a, I guess a date, so that I can it doesn't feel as as painful when it comes to budgeting and just trying to romanticize you know, my budget process.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Yeah, I do something similar. For me, it's at least once a month. And it's a one on one meeting with my partner, since we have joint expenses. And we go over our budget. And it's, it's kind of like what I do every week for my calendar. So every week, at the end of the week, or beginning of the week, I go and look at the previous week, and then plan for the future week. So I do the same thing with my budget, look at the previous month, and expenses, what was budgeted, and then I fill in the category for the actual like, so budgeted amounts and actual amounts. And then for the next month, I create a new budget, a lot of the things over, you know, they stay the same, they roll over to the next month in terms of the amounts.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

But sometimes I noticed like I know in advance certain months, I'm gonna spend more on things like December gifts, or I don't know, just whatever comes up, I start to notice those trends. And so I'm able to to account for that by like, changing and modifying my budget. So there's not like just one thing set in stone, because I think that's the thing that a lot of folks are like, I can't keep up with my budget. I can't like keep up with it. I always go over. And I'm like, why are you accounting for the fact that circumstances change? Yeah. Yeah.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

And then that and just like, like you said, it's gonna be really uncomfortable at first. So getting used to opening up, you know, checking your your bank accounts, or checking your credit card accounts, and doing it regularly, that way, that discomfort or the shame, it starts to dissipate, and slowly you start to get comfortable with your numbers and realize, okay, this is what I spend, and this is, and sometimes it might mean, do I need to take another Get a side hustle or another job? Or do I need to shift amounts over from one thing to the other so that I can, so I can not be in the negative or so that I can not be barely making ends meet or so that I can actually start to save, save for the future, save for emergencies, save for the things that you love, like, you know, in our case travel? Yeah.

Speaker 2

Yeah, absolutely. And I think it comes back to the question I really, I usually, like, really like to pose this question to my, to my listeners, it's like, what is your relationship with money? Why do you feel that not that, you know, some, you know, certain money, like, it belongs to you, but if you have like a very limited, you know, mindset of like, oh, money is bad, or money is not good. Like, maybe you have to work a little bit behind the scenes and like, I usually recommend my listeners to journal, the simple question of like, you know, Where does money come from? Or, like, you know, what is my feelings towards money?

Marisol Ibarra

And I think, you know, really just walking through through those through those questions of like, you know, if money has a bad connotation for you, then maybe try to switch and be like, no money is working in my favor. I get to decide how I want to spend my money and not feel very limited. And I think another factor that I feel that I you know, in the past was really, when it came to money was like, oh my god, like I'm spending money, or like, I'm doing this, but it's like, no, it's allocated in my budget, I shouldn't feel guilty. For me being able to spend this money like I allocated money, very intentional.

Marisol Ibarra

But I think coming from poverty and coming from a very limited unlimited resources, it's really hard to sometimes spend money but when you allocate money, you're like, No, I work really hard for this money and I deserve to maybe if it means going buy a coffee and that makes me happy that I'm going to budget for that but if it means you know, going to the store and buying myself I don't know an extra pair of of running shoes or whatever that is like I'm not gonna feel guilty because in my my budget allows for me to spend that money and I think that's the beauty of of having your finances in order and being able to budget and I have that guilty feeling when you spend money.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Yeah, it's so empowering once you take control of your money. And it's much in the same way that I help people when they're trying to figure out their time management and their processes and their calendaring and things like that. I'm like, if you if you plan it all out if you've got it on your calendar it's okay to not work in the evenings or it's okay to take the weekends off or it's or whatever it is that you have scheduled in for you to get your stuff done like for me I know like if I have already you know planned out my week and I've got you know time dedicated for all the things I need to do. It helps me because I ever so long always thought I have to be working, working, working and never allowed myself to really enjoy life.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

And the same was with money. It was always like try not to spend on anything at all, is all scarcity and try to save and there was never even really a reason to say this is just save and it was for what am I saving for emergencies? Am I saving for the future? Am I saving for? It was just like, save as much as you can spend as little as you can. And that's how you live your life and realized in adulting, that it doesn't have to be that way you can enjoy your life and have moments of joy and, and plan for it and just enjoy enjoying your time enjoy it. Yeah, it's not always gonna be joyful. But you can be intentional with your money and with your planning and other things.

Marisol Ibarra

And I think that's the beauty of adulthood, I think, you know, growing up, our parents did whatever they can to survive, because if they were not thriving, they were surviving, they came to, you know, to a new country surviving and try to make ends meet. So for us, no, maybe we are in a place where we get to design, it's about designing the life that we want. And part time management for me, it's not in my calendar, it's not happening in that is where my personal and professional life like if you have time on my calendar, you're gonna get my attention. If it's not calendar, or I don't put it on my calendar that to do lists, it's not happening. So I think

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

I'm like too, sometimes I wonder, like, am I the only one that's like this?

Speaker 2

No, no, no, no, not at all. Because that's like, it's just just the time and the effort. And I think, you know, being very managing your time is part of adulthood as well, because you have to really come to the realization of like, what is priority? What are my deadlines, what, you know, what causes me to also what takes more time for me to accomplish a certain task, a certain assignment, that is, you know, that it's part of my part of my job? So I think it comes back to knowing yourself, and what are your strengths? And what are your weaknesses, and it's a weakness, you know, maybe take an extra, you know, two hours to really, you know, get better at that task. But it's not until you really are very intentional and saying, you know, I'm gonna do this task at this at this time.

Marisol Ibarra

So for example, me, one of the things that I have more trouble doing is, you know, writing, writing talking points, you know, talking points, you know, for, for I work for a member for a senator. So that takes much more time. And that's when I need the most brainpower. So I'm like, I really have to do this in the morning to that test that I put in the morning. So I think he's just been very mindful of what works for you. But also, I think, give yourself compassion. I think in the beginning, it's trial and error. I didn't know in the beginning, like I was just, I would have a to do list and then and then the to do lists would get through pages long. And then and then I would get too overwhelmed. And then I would procrastinate.

Marisol Ibarra

But I know that my style is like, No, it has to be in my calendar, I have to set a specific time for it. And then I won't procrastinate as much. But if I am procrastinating I asked myself this question of like, why am I procrastinate? And is it because the task is difficult? Is it because it's I don't know what to do? Is it overwhelming? Like, like, there's not like a really concrete plan? Or is it is Do I have a fear behind it? Because sometimes it's a fear of like, you think that you're going to fail at this assignment. So that's why you don't want to do it. Like that. You have to.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

So many perfectionists, yeah, they they procrastinate, because I know. Been there done that.

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, same Yeah, from from personal experience. And that's why I share it. I think it's a living experience. The perfectionism gets to us, and I think you really just got to put yourself out there. And it's not until you really put yourself out there, when you realize that it's like, like, I gotta let go, like, I got to let go, what people are thinking about me, I have to let go of, of what people will say about my work. And you know, just putting yourself out there. It does feel vulnerable, it does feel that you know, that people might judge you. But I think some of these things are behind our head. And it's not until you really put yourself out there when you're really like no, I can improve on this. Or I can I can do better. But it's until you put yourself out there that you really see. See the change?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Yeah, and I just I can't emphasize enough that adulting is hard. Absolutely. And it's harder for some of us than others because of you know, we all have different different strengths and different areas of growth. We also have different ways in which we may be privileged and for those of us with fewer privileges, it will be harder. And so I just want to remind you that going back to what you said myself that it's okay to be compassionate with yourself and to try new things and to like leave room for for change and for assessing like is this working is is not working? Do I need to change things up?

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

That's why when people like asked me oh, what's your system for doing this? So what's your way of doing that? Like, I'm okay, I'll share with you how I do things. But it may not be what works for you. And here are some other things that you could try out, like it's constantly having to assess. And something that might work for you might work for you for a certain period of time, or a certain season, and then it might not work later. So it's just like constantly being willing to try new things, and be compassionate with yourself and see what works and what works, keep doing it until it doesn't. And when it doesn't, you know, try something else out. It that, you know, applies for how you manage your money, how you manage your time, how you manage your stress, how you manage your life.

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, absolutely, it's coming back to that, to like that audit mindset, you know, like an audit, this is no longer serving a purpose by by, you know, it might come next season, you know, maybe it's, you know, a season where it's like, you know, I want to explore I want to try and maybe that is your season and, and go for it. But I think is always willing to try to try new things. And that, you know, things are not set in stone. And I think I often remind folks that things are evolving. We are evolving as human beings. And we're maybe yesterday, I like something this way. But then tomorrow, I might find a new way. And it's like no, I this is how you have the ability to change. And because maybe you said something in the past doesn't mean that you that you have changed your mind. So nothing is set in stone folks.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Well, we're getting close to wrapping up, I wanted to ask you also, if you have any words of advice for students, who are currently an undergrad, getting ready to graduate folks recently out of college who are trying to figure out what's next for them, you know, and folks who just in general, find that adulting is hard, and they're just still trying to figure it out for themselves.

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, absolutely. And I think at first start with, you know, adulting is evolving as well, like, you know, there's going to be times where maybe, you know, you you move out of the city that you grew up in, and it's just evolving. And I think just being very open to it is kind of the first start. And things will change things, you know, change will come but I guess I'll start with with each section that I'd like to cover in my podcast.

Marisol Ibarra

So the first one is like, career, an advice for career is always seek mentors, mentors, is what really allows you to, to learn from people that have done it in the, in the, in the future, like like this can be you and maybe seeking those mentors that can give you this advice of like, do you see yourself in this role? Do you see yourself doing this kind of work? So I always tell folks, like, you know, seek mentors, like if you're, if somebody thinks somebody is curious, like, you know, ask for it for a coffee date. As people people love to talk about themselves. Like, personally, I've noticed that people are like, Yeah, of course, I'm happy to share my journey, I'm happy to share, you know, my process and how I can be helpful. That has been my experience. So like, always seek mentors when it comes to your careers.

Marisol Ibarra

And I think the second part of the career is, you know, notice your inner critic, when it comes to your job, I think inner the inner critic boys that we all have, you know, notice it, I think it all starts with, with with coming to the realization that we that you have an inner critic, but knowing that, you know that that's not who you are, they're just a part of you. But that's not who you are. Because when you notice that inner critic, you're going to be able to do so many amazing things and be like, you know, what, inner critic, be quiet, I got this handle, like, I'm gonna go for it, I'm gonna put myself out there. So that's my two tips for for career.

Marisol Ibarra

You know, money management is, you know, have a budget, start with the budget, I think having a budget will really make you feel that your finances are in order and not have a stress of like, am I gonna have enough for the month? Or am I gonna have, you know, am I making ends meet or, you know, living paycheck to paycheck. So having a budget really allows you to really feel that your life is in control in that area. And I think another tip that maybe we didn't get an opportunity is, you know, look into investments.

Marisol Ibarra

Once I got my first job out of college, I, I was allocating not as much money, you know, to my investment account, but I you know, I open a Roth IRA because I know that I want to retire one day. So I'm investing in that so you know, if folks have any questions about investment, I know that you know, feel free to reach out to me but you know, investment is a great opportunity to build wealth and to build generational wealth. So that's my caveat when it comes to, to money management and just having your finances.

Marisol Ibarra

And the last part that I really emphasize is self care. You know, self love. You can't do any of this work if you know you're not okay. If you're not okay if you're not taking care of your needs. And and also I think self care will look very different. Every single day. You know, really if you know a self care day means for you going on a ride of going, you know, or maybe meditating or maybe doing yoga, you know, take care of yourself, take care of your, of your mental health, you know, that means going to therapy, go to therapy. And that means, you know, you know, making time for yourself to journal and really create a ritual around, you know, your morning routine, you know, whatever that means, but really, really take care of yourself.

Marisol Ibarra

Because if you're not taking care of yourself, unfortunately, you can take care of others, and you can help uplift, you know, community. So those are my my words of advice or my things that I would recommend you know, your listeners to take on. And I know that it's hard life is hard. But I think it's all the way it's how we view it and how we were meant to romanticize our own personal life and don't compare, I think yourself to others were on our journey. And we're all here to live our best life.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

That is great, a really wonderful way to wrap up the podcast. And I feel like each of those points that you shared, for your words of advice could be their own podcast. So thank you so much, buddy. So it's been so wonderful having you on and having you share your your advice, your experience or wisdom, I really appreciate it.

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, absolutely. And and thank you so much for this opportunity to share a little bit about my perspective. And I think what adulthood has looked for me, you know, there has been tears, there has been great labs, but it's all been, you know, an amazing experience. And I thank you for this opportunity. So if, you know, if some of your listeners, you know, want to find me, I have my own podcast Here Comes the Sun, like, I know, you mentioned in the beginning, where I do shed some of these topics, or I share some of these, you know, things that I'm trying to navigate on my own personal journey. And I share them with my listeners, and they share them, like, you know, this is this is life. And this is this is happening to me right now. So folks want to listen to me, I'll leave, you know, you can add everything on my show notes, but it's Here Comes the SUn podcast on Instagram, and you can hear it wherever you listen to your podcast.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

And the last last question is for folks who really, they felt like they wanted to connect with you, they could relate to what you shared or just want to hear more, aside from the podcast. Is there any other way that they can connect with you?

Marisol Ibarra

Yeah, absolutely. Instagram is my go to page. You know, people, like send me DMs, like I'm really casual. Like, you know, like, send me a DM if you have a question or like if there's a topic that I mentioned, or that you're trying to navigate like maybe inner critic, because, you know, inner critic is kind of a new term that I've that I've been seeing, like, no reach out, I'm always happy to do to do episode and or bring experts that you know, that are that are like really good in these topics. So that we can discuss I'm here to help and help you know, folks transition from college, to the workforce, you know, easier rather than you know, so overwhelming.

Dra. Yvette Martinez-Vu

Well, thank you so much. Thank you once again, Marisol. It was really great having you.

Marisol Ibarra

Perfect. Thank you so much.